Scrubs (TV Series)
My Drama Queen (2003)
Zach Braff: Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian
Photos
Quotes
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Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : Shorts, huh?
Janitor : Yeah. What, I don't get to wear shorts, 'cause I'm just a lowly janitor?
Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : I didn't say "lowly."
Janitor : Oh, so now I'm a janitor?
Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : Yes! Have you been drinking?
Janitor : I'm not DRUNK.
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Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : [the Janitor sneaks up on J.D] Holy shhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...
Janitor : [whispering] Shhhhhh! Calm down. I didn't mean to scare you.
Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : [whispering] Why are we whispering?
Janitor : [whispering] I wanted to see if you would whisper because I whispered.
Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : [whispering] I think I would.
Janitor : [in a normal tone] Anyway...
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Janitor : [J.D. is wearing short scrub shorts] So, anyway, you said you liked mine, and I had the wife whip you up a pair of your own! You like 'em?
Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : [flabbergasted] Do I like 'em? Why, just the other day, I was asking myself, "How can I display my package in a way that's both alluring and professional?"
Janitor : Well, there's your answer!
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Jamie Moyer : So, do you think Elliot's somewhere right now, crying her eyes out?
Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : Oh, without a doubt... . But not about me. No, I... I kinda made all that stuff up. It just seems like you and I only really click when something crazy is going on.
Jamie Moyer : Mm.
Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : I dunno, I guess I realized I don't really want to be in a relationship like that.
Jamie Moyer : [sexily] Is that an ultimatum?
Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : No, Jamie, no. It's not an ultimatum, it's just something to think about.
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Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : Hey, uh, I just wanted to say, you were right about Jamie.
Dr. Elliot Reid : Uh-huh. And what does Jamie think you're doing over here?
Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : Asking you not to show up at my apartment drunk, naked, and crying.
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Dr. Elliot Reid : You wanna know why things with Jamie are so 'lamey'?
Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : We're doing fine.
Dr. Elliot Reid : Oh, please. She's clearing you out of her apartment.
Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : Wrong! She just came by because she knows today at work, I need my...
[rummages through the box]
Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : ... squash goggles.
Dr. Elliot Reid : Mm.
Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : I have to saw something later.