Seinfeld (TV Series)

The Pool Guy (1995)

Jason Alexander: George Costanza

Photos 

Quotes 

• George Costanza : You have no idea of the *magnitude* of this thing! If she is allowed to infiltrate this world, then George Costanza as you know him, *ceases* to exist! You see, right now, I have Relationship George, but there is also Independent George. That's the George you know, the George you grew up with - Movie George, Coffee Shop George, Liar George, Bawdy George.

  Jerry Seinfeld : I love that George.

  George Costanza : Me too! And he's dying Jerry! If Relationship George walks through this door, he will kill Independent George! A George, divided against itself, *cannot* stand!

• George Costanza : I know you're there, laughing at me. Laughing and lying and laughing!

• Jerry Seinfeld : Hey Elaine.

  Elaine Benes : Hey.

  Jerry Seinfeld : Who do you think would win in a fight between me and gorgeous George here?

  Elaine Benes : You mean in a real *fight* fight?

  Jerry Seinfeld : Mano a baldo.

  Elaine Benes : George.

  George Costanza : Ah-Ha!

  Jerry Seinfeld : Why?

  Elaine Benes : George fights dirty.

  Jerry Seinfeld : Really? What would you do?

  George Costanza : Pull hair, poke eyes, groin stuff. Whatever I gotta do.

  Jerry Seinfeld : Hmm.

• George Costanza : This is not good. Worlds are colliding. GEORGE IS GETTING UPSET!

• Cosmo Kramer : Using your touch-tone keypad, please enter the first three letters of the movie title, now.

  [Kramer has no idea which buttons George pressed] 

  Cosmo Kramer : You've selected Agent Zero? If that's correct, press one.

  George Costanza : What?

  Cosmo Kramer : You've selected Brown-Eyed Girl? If this is correct, press one... Why don't you just tell me the name of the movie you selected?

  George Costanza : Chunnel?

  Cosmo Kramer : To find the theater nearest you, please enter your zip code.

  [George enters his zip code and Kramer has no idea which numbers he entered] 

  Cosmo Kramer : Why don't you just tell me where you want to see the movie?

• George Costanza : Well, that was really a stupid thing! You know what's gonna happen now?

  Jerry Seinfeld : Worlds collide.

  George Costanza : Yeah!

  Jerry Seinfeld : Because this world is your sanctuary... and if that world comes in contact with this world...

  George Costanza : Yes! It blows up! So, if you know that, what did you tell Elaine for?

  Jerry Seinfeld : I didn't know. Kramer told me about the worlds.

  George Costanza : You couldn't figure out the worlds theory for yourself? It's just common sense! Anybody knows you gotta keep your worlds apart!

• George Costanza : This is not good! Worlds are colliding! George is gettin' upset!

• George Costanza : I know they're in there! The three of them! Laughing at me! Together! Laughing and lying! It's, it's killing independent George! They're, they're, they're all in on it! Worlds are colliding!