The Simpsons (TV Series)

Brother from Another Series (1997)

Nancy Cartwright: Bart Simpson, Ralph Wiggum

Quotes 

• Bart : And God bless mom, and dad, and Lisa, and Maggie, and please God - kill sideshow Bob.

  [praying at his bed while Marge and Homer secretly watch outside his room] 

  Marge : Bart, no!

  Bart : It's him or me, O Lord.

  Marge : You can't ask God to kill someone.

  Homer : Yeah! You do your own dirty work.

• Bart : Guess who!

  Cecil Terwilliger : Maris?

• Lisa : Face it, Bart, Sideshow Bob has changed.

  Bart : No he hasn't. He's more the same than ever.

• [Bart and Lisa are watching Krusty's Prison Special] 

  Bart : Man, those cons *love* Krusty. Inside every hardened criminal beats the heart of a ten-year-old boy.

  Lisa : And vice-versa.

• Bart : [worried about Sideshow Bob being released on parole]  If only you knew what he was thinking!

  [in the car] 

  Sideshow Bob : [thinking]  I hope they still make that shampoo I like.

• Krusty the Klown : [spotting Sideshow Bob at his prison concert]  What have you been doing with yourself, Bob?

  Sideshow Bob : Well, Krusty, as you may remember, after I tried to frame you for armed robbery, I tried to murder Selma Bouvier. Let's see... I rigged the mayoral elections, I tried to blow up Springfield with a nuclear device, and I tried to kill you.

  Krusty the Klown : [nervous laugh]  Oh, yeah.

  Sideshow Bob : And, whenever I could find a spare moment, I've tried to murder Bart Simpson.

  Bart : [watching on television]  Ahh! Ahh! Ahh!

  [Bart runs out of the room in terror] 

  Homer : [calling after Bart]  He said "tried"!

• Cecil Terwilliger : At last, I'm going to do what Bob never could: kill Bart Simpson!

  Bart : By throwing me off a dam? Isn't that a little crude for a genius like you?

  Cecil Terwilliger : Ooh, I suppose it is. Ehh, if anyone asks, I'll lie.

• Sideshow Bob : Will you children stop tormenting me? I've done nothing wrong.

  Bart : Give it up, bob - we found the money!

  [shows Bob a suitcase full of money] 

  Sideshow Bob : Where did that come from? I've never seen that money before in my life.

  Lisa : Then you must have had your eyes closed when you embezzled it!

• Lisa : Hey! You said we were going to Dairy Queen.

  [as Bart jumps into a dumpster] 

  Bart : I lied... Now help me rummage through Bob's trash for clues. And I promise we'll go to the water slide.

  Lisa : Okay.

• Bart : [worried about Sideshow Bob being released on parole]  If only you knew what he was thinking!

  [in the car] 

  Bart : I hope they still make that shampoo I like.