- Casey McCall: [on the air] It's a holiday weekend, so if you're driving out to the stadium tomorrow, please *please* remember to take your car.
- Casey McCall: How am I conversationally anal-retentive?
- Dana Whitaker: Let me answer that question in four parts with the fourth part first and the third part last. The second part has five syllables -
- Casey McCall: All right, all right, all right!
- Dan Rydell: Okay, I don't think there's any way I could be colder.
- Kim: What if you were wet?
- Dan Rydell: I'd be very cold. But as cold as I'd be under that circumstance, I still don't think there'd be any discernable difference between how cold I'd be then and how cold I am now. That's how cold I am.
- Casey McCall: Soooo, you're cold?
- Dan Rydell: I'm pretty cold.
- Dana Whitaker: We're taking care of it.
- Dan Rydell: And if it's possible, I'd like to look just a little bit more like Elmer Fudd.
- Jeremy Goodwin: Natalie's right. If this is professional television, surely there's some kind of strict procedure that's followed when something like this happens.
- Dana Whitaker: Absolutely.
- Jeremy Goodwin: What is it?
- Dana Whitaker: Well, first, everyone, stand up and see if you're sitting on it.
- Casey McCall: [Holding up fingers] We were this close to beating Miami. This close. Do you know how many times we've beaten Miami?
- Dan Rydell: You've never beaten Miami.
- Casey McCall: We've never beaten Miami. Now who am I supposed to see about that?
- Dan Rydell: A therapist?
- Casey McCall: They tell me I'm all over the radio in the Great Lakes region.
- Elliott: Have you ever been to the Great Lakes?
- Casey McCall: Yeah, four of 'em.
- Elliott: How are they?
- Casey McCall: They're great!