- [first lines]
- Katrina: Hey, Scottie.
- Skyler Dayton: Yeah, what?
- Katrina: Check out this picture of Jude Law jogging with his shirt off.
- Skyler Dayton: You know, he just is not my type. I could never date a guy with better eyelashes than me.
- Katrina: Oh, come on! He is the most gorgeous man on earth and he keeps getting more gorgeous. Every time I think he is the most gorgeous a person can be. he outdoes himself. But no, I am pretty sure this picture is the most gorgeous someone can be.
- [turns the page]
- Katrina: He did it again!
- Skyler Dayton: Gosh, you're every bit as pretty as Harold said. Yeah, I just... don't see the family resemblance.
- Zoey: Oh, that's because I acquired a higher than usual number of dominant genes from my mother's genome. Huh?
- Skyler Dayton: OK, now I see it.
- Gavin P. Miller: Thanks for sending me those sand yams, by the way. You know, I, uh, I canned them and made candied sand yams.
- Zoey: I'd love to taste them.
- Gavin P. Miller: Oh, you can. I canned them.
- Zoey: You can can candied sand yams?
- Gavin P. Miller: You can. You can can candied sand yams.
- Katrina: This is the worst Dr. Seuss book ever.
- [last lines]
- Harold: You two are perfect for each other.
- Gavin P. Miller: Wow! Thank you. Still all those mean things did just roll right off your tongue, didn't they.
- Harold: Believe me, if I had given you my approval it would have been the kiss of death.
- Gavin P. Miller: Wow. I do like Zoey.
- Harold: Well, welcome to the family.
- [he kisses Gavin on the forehead as Skyler enters]
- Skyler Dayton: Eeuw. At least I thought I was kissing Bono.
- Skyler Dayton: You know, a friend of mine used hypnotherapy to get over his fear of sharks.
- Harold: Did it work?
- Skyler Dayton: Unfortunately, yes.
- Zoey: So how is Charlotte? She's so great!
- Gavin P. Miller: Oh, didn't you hear? We got divorced.
- Zoey: Thank God!
- Gavin P. Miller: Why does everyone always say that?