- Chloe: [uncomfortable with her bust size] I am so sick of hearing men make those stupid comments. 'Hey baby, how about coming over here and keeping the rain off me?'
- Jack Tripper: What do they say on sunny days?
- Chloe: I can't remember the last time a guy looked into my eyes. They could be hard boiled eggs for all they care.
- Chrissy Snow: Oh, you have lovely eyes. Right, Jack?
- Jack Tripper: Sure, I noticed your eggs, I mean eyes...
- Chrissy Snow: Oh, Janet, I am so sorry you didn't get the job.
- Janet Wood: Thank you, Chrissy. You know, when I first started high school I had absolutely no figure at all. I kept praying I would blossom.
- [wipes tears out of her eyes]
- Janet Wood: One day... one day the teacher asked the class to locate the great American flatlands, and
- [shakes her head]
- Janet Wood: every single boy in class pointed to me.
- Chrissy Snow: [with all the simpathy in the world] Oh, boy, you must have died.
- Janet Wood: Woe.
- Chrissy Snow: You know, it is that stupid male attitude we had to grow up with.
- Janet Wood: I know, I know. If we didn't need training bras by the time we were ten, our lives were ruined.
- Chrissy Snow: Why are men so hung up on a big bosom?
- Janet Wood: Because they're all brainwashed. Here, look at this magazine... . There's not an ad in here that doesn't have cleavage. Do you honestly need a blonde in a bikini to sell a sports car?
- [as Chrissy shakes her head, she turns page, chuckles:]
- Janet Wood: Or a redhead in a wet T-shirt to sell a lawn sprinkler?
- Chrissy Snow: Or look at this one. I mean, is it really necessary to show a woman in her underwear?
- Janet Wood: That's an ad for underwear.
- Chrissy Snow: [makes silly face] Oh.
- Jack Tripper: Where would all the great women of history be if they thought like that? Look at Joan of Arc and what she accomplished. And Florence Nightingale and Madame Curie.
- Chrissy Snow: And Lucrezia Borgia.
- Janet Wood: She poisoned people.
- Chrissy Snow: Yeah, but she was very good at it.
- Jack Tripper: [puts a piece of cheese into her mouth] Chew. Don't talk.
- Chrissy Snow: [cheerleading while the others are trying to talk] Chicka chicka boom! Chicka chicka bah! I don't know the rest of it, so ha ha ha!
- Jack Tripper: [shoves a piece of cheese into her mouth] Chrissy Chrissy chew chew rah rah rah!
- Chrissy Snow: [to irate landlord] Oh, hi, Mr. Roper.
- Stanley Roper: Would you two mind not jumping on the ceiling?
- Chrissy Snow: We're not jumping on the ceiling. We're jumping on the floor.
- Stanley Roper: Well, your floor happens to be over my ceiling. And my ceiling is over my head. So when you are jumping on your floor, you're jumping on my head!