- [opening narration]
- Narrator: Mr. Mulligan, a rather dour critic of his times, is shortly to discover the import of that old phrase, 'Out of the frying pan, into the fire' - said fire burning brightly at all times - in The Twilight Zone.
- Woodrow Mulligan: [title card]
- [yelling at a person]
- Woodrow Mulligan: CENSORED.
- [yells at another person, title card]
- Woodrow Mulligan: ALSO CENSORED.
- [closing narration]
- Narrator: 'To each his own' - so goes another old phrase to which Mr. Woodrow Mulligan would heartily subscribe, for he has learned - definitely the hard way - that there's much wisdom in a third old phrase, which goes as follows: 'Stay in your own backyard.' To which it might be added, 'and, if possible, assist others to stay in theirs' - via, of course, The Twilight Zone.