The Vicar of Dibley (TV Series)
Autumn (1999)
Gary Waldhorn: David Horton
Quotes
-
David Horton : So what are you doing on Saturday?
Geraldine : I'll be working on my Simon - Sermon!
[In reference to David's brother]
David Horton : Oh, What's your text?
Geraldine : Uhmmm... Sermon on the Mount, I hope.
David Horton : [Later] Perhaps you can come for lunch on Sunday. Good old fashion pork on the menu.
Geraldine : I believe I'll be having that on Saturday...
-
Owen Newitt : On principle, I'm a great believer in sex before marriage. Otherwise I wouldn't have had any sex at all.
David Horton : Well, unfortunately my memory is that Jesus was against it, which I think is a problem when we're talking about our vicar.
Owen Newitt : But things were very different in His day. Women weren't emancipated, and they hadn't yet launched Minx Magazine.
[Hugo nods in agreement]
Owen Newitt : I mean Hugo, I bet you and Alice were at it like rabbits before you were married!
Hugo : [Nods enthusiastically] Well, right! Yes!
Owen Newitt : What did I tell you?
David Horton : [Sternly] Hugo?
Hugo : Yes, well... we... certainly ate a lot of carrots together.
-
Owen Newitt : Seems fine to me.
David Horton : What, for a vicar to go around having sex willy nilly in front of her parishioners?
Owen Newitt : I shouldn't think it's a case of willy nilly. Willy's got to be willing! You can't do it with a willy that's nilly.
David Horton : Oh, be serious, Owen!
-
David Horton : Item one, apologies for absence.
Frank Pickle : Yes, I have a note from the last meeting to say that Jim can't be with us today.
Jim : Why can't I be with you? What have I done?
David Horton : No. you said you couldn't be with us.
Jim : I did? Where - where am I meant to be?