The Vicar of Dibley (TV Series)

Community Spirit (1994)

Liz Smith: Letitia Cropley

Photos 

Quotes 

• David Horton : Item two: Mindless Vandalism. As you probably know, we have an outbreak of graffiti in the village.

  Letitia Cropley : Oh, yes, I saw that. I don't think you're a prat, Mr Horton.

  David Horton : No-one said I was.

  Owen Newitt : Yes, some bugger's scrawled: "Mr Horton's a total prat" on the Scout Hut wall.

  David Horton : We also seem to have acquired a village *Puss* Office. You keeping up, Frank?

  Frank Pickle : Yeah. Horton's a total prat.

  David Horton : Well, let's just keep an eye out for them, shall we? Especially the little *bastard* who's tampered with the sign for the *Tuck* Shop.

• David Horton : This is intolerable!

  [Enters the church hall where everyone is still working on preparations for the fete] 

  David Horton : Isn't it time you all went to bed?

  Alice Tinker : It's a last minute idea I had. We're having a fashion parade at the end of the fete, and people have to come as characters from Elton John's songs.

  Geraldine Granger : Oh, look at Mrs C!

  [Mrs Cropley is wearing an evening dress and a curly blonde wig] 

  David Horton : Ah, Mrs Cropley! Am I mistaken, or did Mr John write a song about Danny La Rue?

  Letitia Cropley : No - Marilyn Monroe. "It seemed to him, she lived her life like a candle in the wind, ever knowing who to cling to when the rain set in."

  Geraldine Granger : I think you'll find David, that Jim is our star turn. Come in, Jim Trott!

  [Jim enters wearing jeans and a Union Jack tank top with a bald wig] 

  Jim Trott : [In a thug voice]  A skinhead!

  [singing while putting up his fists] 

  Jim Trott : Saturday night's alright for fighting!

  David Horton : [Unimpressed]  Yes, well. Much as I'd like to dress up like someone who's had their brain surgically removed Vicar, I think you'll find that myself and Hugo will not have the time to join in this particular piece of high class entertainment!

  Geraldine Granger : Hugo!

  [Hugo skips into the room wearing a blue and white gingham pinafore dress with a white blouse and a wig with bunches and gives a twirl] 

  Hugo Horton : Get it? I-I'm Dorothy. Wizard of Oz. "Goodbye Yellow Brick Road." I-I borrowed one of Alice's dresses.

  [His smile fades as David glares at him with arms folded] 

  Hugo Horton : Sorry, Father.

  [Puts his hands to his chest]