- James T. West: You're A.J. Pringle? But it's all wrong.
- Dr. Abigail J. Pringle: Wrong?
- James T. West: Dr. Pringle should be a short, overweight, balding, middle-aged professor with a little gray moustache. You're quite beautiful.
- Dr. Abigail J. Pringle: That's enough, Mr. West. I've heard about you - the man with the velvet charm. But don't let my sex mislead you. I'm a scientist, first, last, and always. Is that understood?
- Capt. Horatio Philo: You all hated my dinner, didn't you?
- Artemus Gordon: Oh, no, no, no, no, Captain! It's just that we landlubbers aren't really ready for the seaweed age, that's all.
- Capt. Horatio Philo: Don't patronize me, Mr. Gordon! I'm not a feeble-minded eccentric! Ach, manna from heaven? Really, how outmoded that is. It should be kelp from the depths. Kelp! Richer in food value and more life-giving than all the other foods that men grub the earth for. And an inexhaustible supply, to boot, from the vast reservoir of the oceans.
- Capt. Horatio Philo: Round up all the men and bring them here. In less than thirty minutes we'll blow up the ocean floor. The whole coastline will be under ten feet of seawater!