- Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: And that's how we got the emperor's letter out of Austria. Sadly though, the Kaiser got wind of what the emperor was up to. He called the kid in on the carpet, gave 'em a real dressing down. I don't know what pressure he applied, or what force he used, but he forced emperor Karl to go back on his promise. So, the war dragged on for another year. A few more million lives were lost. Karl's prediction came true: the thousand year monarchy crumbled. He was the last emperor of Austria.
- Postal Woman: What a drag!
- Postal Woman: [old Indy is grabbing around in a US mail box] Once you dropped something in that box, it becomes the property of the U.S. government until delivery.
- Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: Oh, dear me. I haven't had so much trouble delivering a package since the incident in Vienna back when I was a spy.
- Postal Woman: Spy? You mean like James Bond?
- Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: I mean a real spy in the war!
- Postal Woman: What war?
- Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: World War One. Of course we didn't number it back at the time, because we had no idea there was gonna be a sequel.
- Prince Sixtus of Bourbon-Parma: That's the trick cyclist we passed on the way in. We thought he was an errand boy.
- Indiana Jones: That's captain errand boy to you, second lieutenant. And unless you're dressed for a masquerade I fully expect to be saluted.
- Indiana Jones: German spies don't concern me so much. All they do is shoot us. It's the Austrian secret police that worries me more.
- Prince Sixtus of Bourbon-Parma: And what would they do?
- Indiana Jones: Poke our eyes out, strip our flesh, feed us our innards, for starters.
- Prince Sixtus of Bourbon-Parma: Now what?
- Indiana Jones: Now we make contact with Schultz. Or rather, he makes contact with us.
- Xavier: I wonder what this Schultz looks like?
- Indiana Jones: I can't tell. I'm sure he's a master of disguise.
- Schultz: I'm Schultz.
- Prince Sixtus of Bourbon-Parma: [recognizing the plump lady from the train] You're right, he is a master of disguise.
- Schultz: This is no time for jokes. There is danger. Follow me.
- Prince Sixtus of Bourbon-Parma: Well, Lieutenant. Unless you're dressed for a masquerade, we fully expect to be saluted.
- Indiana Jones: Don't press your royal luck.
- Count Ottokar Graf Czerin: These... demands are somewhat problematic.
- Emperor Karl I of Austria: But not altogether unjustified.
- Count Ottokar Graf Czerin: The Kaiser can be a powerful enemy. As England and France have already learned.
- Emperor Karl I of Austria: I'm not merely being noble. It's not just the men in the trenches I want to save. I don't want to go down in history as the last emperor of Austria. The one who let a thousand year monarchy crumble through his fingers like dust.
- Prince Sixtus of Bourbon-Parma: Shakespeare said: first thing we should do let's kill all the lawyers. He was wrong. We should start with the bloody diplomats!
- Emperor Karl I of Austria: [slipping a letter into Indy's coat] Our brothers are precious. I know you'll look after them.
- Prince Sixtus of Bourbon-Parma: The sewer was a really wonderful idea.
- [Indy throws a towel in Sixtus' face]
- Prince Sixtus of Bourbon-Parma: What an incredible new smell you've discovered.
- Dr. Henry 'Indiana' Jones, Jr.: [to female postal worker] You know, I've always had a thing for ladies in uniform.
- [she laughs]