- Cadpig: How can you harden your heart to this majestic mollusk... this courtly crustacean? How can you be so selfish to a shell fish?
- Roger Dearly: This is a smoke-free house. Not one cigarette touches your lips! You'll have to quit like I did: cold turkey!
- Cruella de Vil: That does it, Anita. I'll never smoke again. I've hit bottom. Once you've chewed on a man's socks, the world is a whole different flavor.
- Spot: What do you mean you liberated a lobster?
- Cadpig: I had no choice. He was heading for that big butter bath in the sky!
- Spot: But it's stealing! The lobster police will get us for sure.
- Rolly: Spot's right. We gotta eat the evidence. Anybody got a squeeze of lemon?
- Cadpig: Rolly, how could you?
- Rolly: Nothing personal. It's a food chain thing.
- Cadpig: You said you were going to make him a contributing member of society!
- Swamp Rat: He's contributing to my gumbo recipe. Close enough.
- [the match Swamp Rat is holding catches his fingers on fire]
- Swamp Rat: Yeow! I hope a little kid never holds a lit match like that! That could hurt!
- Rolly: You'll never get away with this, Swamp Rat! A decent gumbo needs cayenne pepper!
- Swamp Rat: There's plenty of cayenne in it, chubby boy! The secret is to start with a wallop of kosher salt.
- Rolly: Salt? No, no, no. First, the cayenne pepper, then the...
- Cadpig, Lucky, Spot: [shouts] Rolly!
- Cruella de Vil: On my ship, we serve only the freshest sea food. It's so fresh, it fights back. Don't you just love an entree with spunk?
- Cadpig: Is it possible that I was an unclear communicator? Demonstrated poor listening skills? Was too caught up in my mission to assess Lance's needs?
- Lucky, Spot, Rolly: Uh-huh!
- Rolly: And don't forget to add a count of Grand Theft Lobster!
- Spot: Hey, you were just trying to help a fellow creature. We know your heart was in the right place.
- Anita Dearly: Cruella, what's wrong?
- Cruella de Vil: My bedroom! That's what's wrong! Burned to a crisp!
- Roger Dearly: So, now it matches the kitchen, den and garage?
- Cruella de Vil: Very amusing, Randy, but that's the least of my problems.
- [last lines]
- Cadpig: Perhaps returning this rubber band to Cap'n Buddy will express my everlasting remorse. Lance? Lance!
- Alarm System: Please, step away from the lobster.