Undergrads (TV Series)

Party (2001)

Pete Williams: Parker 'Nitz' Walsh, Justin 'Gimpy' Taylor, Cal Evans, Rocko Gambiani

Photos 

Quotes 

• Rocko : Oh Great Gazoo. What should I do?

  Gimpy : [over Mump's two-way radio]  Show some dignity, man. You're making an ass of yourself.

  Rocko : Huh?

  Great Gazoo : Show 'nuff diggity man. Keep making a jolly old ass of yourself.

  [pause] 

  Great Gazoo : Dum-dum.

• Gimpy : So guys, tell me. How was your first week at college? Tell me. Tell me.

  Rocko : Well, I'm this close to getting into Alpha Alpha and then I'm going to get laid like a champ. Because frat boys get the jimmy waxed 24-7.

  Gimpy : Yeah, frat guys. They're the best. Whimsical, racist, sexist, violent, drunken, frinking frat guys. Man, oh man, They are the bomb indeed.

  Rocko : So you're happy for me?

  Gimpy : NO, and I'll tell you why - You'd be a frat guy and I'm a nerd. Nerds and frat guys are mortal enemies like Jews and Arabs, Jedi and Sith, and of course, spaghetti and milk.

• Rocko : Arrest me for Alpha. Arrest me for Alpha.

• Rocko : Wieners, wieners, wieners! Put 'em in your mouth! Wieners, wieners, wieners, get it it's like my Johnson! Alpha.

• Cal : Hey guy! I love kissin' ladies! They're soft.

• Gimpy : I just lost ten good men on the field of honor. Do you know how that feels? It feels like someone made you swallow a fishing hook tied the other end to a tractor trailer and then dragged your guts from here to Las Vegas!

  Parker 'Nitz' Walsh : So, you're not up for coffee?

  Gimpy : Sure, come on over.

• Mump : What if I get caught, tortured or hungry?

  Gimpy : You'll be disguised as a common, ordinary, everday member of the California highway patrol. And uh, so I can keep an eye on you...

  [shoves helmet and sunglasses on him] 

  Mump : [falling over]  Is there a camera in the helmet?

  Gimpy : No, the camera is in the sunglasses. This is just a big, big helmet.

• Cal : Here's a flyer to a mixer! Do you ladies like cheese and Boggle?

  European Girls : Yah! Yah!

• Cal : Hey sorry guy, no seats left.

  European Girls : Yah! NO.

• [playing Boggle] 

  Cal : Hey guy, you sunk my Battleship!

• Gimpy : Listen to them screaming! It's all my fault, I've killed them Artoo!

• Gimpy : You're on my side, and the dark side, like Lando Calrissian?

  Rocko : Sure Gimp. Like whatever the hell you just said.

• Rocko : You're gonna haze me right?

  Craig the Fraternity Leader : No. Hazing has been banned on the Central State Junior Community College campus since 1983 when a student became permanently brain-drunk.

  Rocko : No hazing? Where have I heard that before?

  Frat boy : [Rocko remembering a TV show he saw as a kid]  And of course, there's no hazing!

  Frat pledge : That's rad! Hazing is grody!

  [gets splashed with something awful] 

  Frat pledge : Ahh! My Aca Joe windbreaker!

  Frat boy : You idiot! You should have *demanded* to be hazed! Now you'll *never* get into the frat! Never! Never never!

  Rocko : Never... never... never...

  Craig the Fraternity Leader : Rocko?

  Rocko : I'm onto your little game! I'm going to haze *myself* in the name of Alpha Alpha! I'll be the best pledge you ever had! Even if I have to kill the President!

  Craig the Fraternity Leader : Rocko, you really don't have to kill the President.

  Rocko : Oh we'll just see about that.