- [Despite the efforts of Rick, Albert and Dwayne, the baby keeps crying]
- Rick: Albert, I think I've found the problem.
- Albert Dudley: You have? Then would you care to share it with us, hmmm?
- Rick: His pants are all ishy.
- Albert Dudley: Ishy? Ishy? And what, pray, is the definition of... oh.
- [all three awkwardly withdraw their hands]
- Dwayne Stockton: Well, I'm not gonna change him!
- Rick: [puts on his gardening gloves] I'll do it.
- Albert Dudley: No, no, no, I'll do it!
- [speaks to the baby in a soothing manner]
- Albert Dudley: Now, now, it's all right, Uncle Albert's here... there we go.
- [removes the baby's diaper, and the baby pees on him]
- Dwayne Stockton: Aww, it's a boy!
- Albert Dudley: Where did this baby come from?
- Rick: Well, when a man and a woman love each other very much...
- Albert Dudley: We're in big trouble here, Rick has stolen a baby!
- Dwayne Stockton: A-and?
- Albert Dudley: And we've got a problem! Think of the scandal! Stonehill's stock will plummet, and we'll all be out of a job!
- [last lines]
- [Randolf discovers a milk bottle]
- Randolf Stonehill: Hilary... you promised you wouldn't! HILARY!