- Donald Watkins: Let's cut straight to the chase. You've invented what we've been calling in official documents, a blood car. You beat us when we didn't play fair, so now we've all agreed to act civil. Civility. Civilian. The civil war? They all started the same way, Archie. The Civil war was started over people using other people - black people-as servants. Not really like humans, but like animals, to pull carts and plant vegetables. And you know all about vegetables, don't you? It was a good idea, but it didn't work-the vegetable for the car thing. Slavery didn't work either, but that's because it was racist. Killing people for fuel is not racist. It's patriotic. It's all about making a sacrifice to fuel our cars, mow our grass, and grill our steaks-if you're not a charcoal man that is. Sure, it came down to us and the Russians, like everything else, and we've beaten 'em,. You've beaten them. Us has beaten them. US. Spell it out Archie, U. S. The US. No other nation can say that. Not even in their native tongue. Outer space is uncharted territory, no matter what they told you about Columbus. The plans just keep getting closer. The farther away we get from Antarctic oil drilling; hard-boiled potatoes, used in apple pies; the Euro. And tarantulas. Deadly tarantulas. For sale in vending machines. Do you understand what I'm saying to you? We need you to build another blood powered engine, we need your help. We need another blood car. We need blood trucks, blood tanks, blood planes, and blood lawnmowers. We need your work to continue. We can't duplicate it. We don't even understand how it works in the first place. How it could possibly work in the first place. But it does. We can't just release this to the public. No one wants hysteria, riots, mass graves. You don't mix milk chocolate and peanuts on your own. You leave it to the pros and reap the benefits. What do you say?
- Denise: Put a taco in my mouth and your dick in my ass.
- Archie Andrews: What kind of tacos do you want?
- Archie Andrews: Puppies... You killed that girl with puppies... Things are changing man, get it together!
- Lorraine: Hey, Archie. What's up? How was school?
- Archie Andrews: Oh, fine. I need more wheatgrass.
- Lorraine: Hey, I thought of a great idea for your wheatgrass engine. What if you put pedals on it? Like a bike? Then you can ride it, like a bike? it's, it's just an idea that I had.
- Archie Andrews: $2.00?
- Lorraine: Actually it's $2.50. Wheatgrass prices are going up.
- Archie Andrews: Are you joking?
- Lorraine: No, no kidding. But hey for you $2.00.
- Archie Andrews: Are you sure?
- Lorraine: Of course. You're only like my best customer.
- Archie Andrews: I appreciate it.
- Lorraine: Hey, Archie, I was thinking, would you wanna maybe, hang out sometime? I would really like to see your wheatgrass engine. It's just an idea, another one that's real bad.
- Archie Andrews: I'm real busy.
- Lorraine: And it's a school night, I guess.
- Archie Andrews: Yeah, It sure is, sometime though. Maybe.
- Lorraine: I love this car, Archie.
- Archie Andrews: I need to clean it a little bit.
- Lorraine: I think it's lovely.
- Archie Andrews: Uh, yeah. Do you wanna get a bite to eat or something?
- Lorraine: I'd love that.
- Archie Andrews: Steakhouse?
- Lorraine: I'd love that. I love steakhouse, Archie.
- Archie Andrews: No you don't.
- Lorraine: Uhh... oh you're right.
- Archie Andrews: Cut it out, Lorraine. Cut it.
- Lorraine: I'm sorry, I'm just nervous.
- Archie Andrews: I'm nervous all the time.
- Lorraine: No, you're not.
- Archie Andrews: Yeah, I am.
- Lorraine: You're nervous right now?
- Archie Andrews: Yeah. I'm a little nervous.
- Lorraine: Well, what makes you nervous? it's just you and me.
- Archie Andrews: Maybe I'm just hungry.
- Lorraine: Well, eat.
- Archie Andrews: You wanna go to my apartment and get some food?
- Lorraine: Yes.
- Denise: Thanks, Poncho Villa. After you get that, why don't you bring us a couple of margaritas and two shots of tequila?
- Archie Andrews: Why can't I just take you home?
- Denise: Uh-uh. I'm sick of stalkers. Goddamn sick of them. And if I don't let you buy me food and stick your tongue in my ass, you'll be in the bushes with the rest of them. Crying and whacking off every time you get two beers in you. Shit, you'd probably write poetry.
- Archie Andrews: I'm not like that.
- Denise: Yeah, right, sissy. I bet you writer sonnets and all that shit.
- Archie Andrews: No. I mean I'm not a stalker.
- Denise: Well, you're not actually a stalker until you stalk somebody. So why don't you think about that when you go home and write haikus about my box?
- Archie Andrews: Listen, Denise, it is a school night for me. I shouldn't get too many drinks in me.
- Denise: Well, it's a meat stand night for me, and you don't hear me whining. What, you're in school?
- Archie Andrews: I'm a teacher. Elementary school.
- Denise: Ugh, you teach children? They give me the creeps I never really liked them.
- Archie Andrews: No, they're nice.
- Denise: Come on. Batter up there, Professor.
- Archie Andrews: No, I shouldn't.
- Denise: Come on. You can't fuck in the bathroom of a Mexican restaurant sober. So kill that shot and cannonball that 'rita. Come on. Drinky, drinky. I got to piss.
- Archie Andrews: Hey, there!
- Vietnam Vetran: Hey.
- Archie Andrews: How are you?
- Vietnam Vetran: Oh, I'm okay. I'm okay. Hey, can you spare some change for some food?
- Archie Andrews: Oh, yeah. Sure, I can.
- Vietnam Vetran: Oh, thanks.
- Archie Andrews: You say you need some food?
- Vietnam Vetran: Yeah. Yeah, I do. I'm really hungry.
- Archie Andrews: Well, I was gonna drive to a diner and eat. Would you like to join me?
- Vietnam Vetran: Drive? You drive? Hey, did you leave that car running over there like that?
- Archie Andrews: Yeah. Yeah, I did. It's a little embarrassing.
- Vietnam Vetran: Oh, hell. You must be made out of money to walk off and leave a car running like that. Yeah, I'll go eat with you.
- Archie Andrews: Okay, great. Great. You want to ride in the car?
- Vietnam Vetran: Oh, ride in a car and eat fancy and all that? I might need a tie.
- Archie Andrews: Yeah, you might. You might.
- Axed Agent: All right, son, let's talk this out, huh? 'Cause I don't know if you've ever been shot, but I've got to tell you, it hurts like fuck! And I will shoot you! All right, come on, man, why don't you just come out here? We'll sit down, we'll talk about it, we'll figure something out. I mean, I don't have to hurt you. I mean, trust me, I won't fucking hesitate, but I don't have to hurt you. Dammit. Where is he?
- Denise: Whoa. Could have hit the showers before coming out. No big deal. Just clean up a little. You working on the car or something? Rough day? Me too. Want some barbecue?
- Archie Andrews: Barbecue?
- Denise: I love eating barbecue after a bad day. No place on Earth filled with more sad, depressed, fat-necked fuckers than a barbecue joint. Look at them. Pathetic. Rib-eating motherfuckers.
- Car Jacker: Start pumping.
- Archie Andrews: Listen, I didn't want to say, but I have some gas in the trunk.
- Car Jacker: Oh, hold the fuck up. Probably got more than that in the motherfucking trunk. Probably got a motherfucking pistol or shotgun or something in the motherfucking trunk. Listen, we're gonna fill this motherfucker up, we're gonna ride a fucking tank of gas out of here, and you're gonna drop me off at the motherfucking house. Now, don't try no motherfucking shit.
- Archie Andrews: No, no, no, I didn't...
- Car Jacker: Give me the goddamn motherfucking keys, motherfucker. What's in the trunk, man? What's in the goddamn trunk?
- Archie Andrews: Just gas!
- Car Jacker: Let me see what's in this motherfucker. Hold still, motherfucker. You trying to hide something? Shit! Damn!
- Lorraine: Hi, Archie.
- Archie Andrews: Hello, Lorraine. Doing all right?
- Lorraine: Oh, you know, just here. You know? How's your wheatgrass car coming along?
- Archie Andrews: Yeah, it's coming along, I guess.
- Lorraine: That's a great shirt. It's really funny.
- Archie Andrews: Just need some more wheatgrass today.
- Lorraine: Did you get a new bike?
- Archie Andrews: No, I didn't. Two dollars, right?
- Lorraine: Really, it looks different. Maybe it got a new haircut.
- Archie Andrews: What?
- Lorraine: I was just making a joke.
- Archie Andrews: Uhm, yeah. Yeah. Bye, Lorraine.
- Lorraine: Yeah.
- Archie Andrews: Take it easy.
- Lorraine: I'll see you later.
- Lorraine: It works, Archie! You got it to work?
- Archie Andrews: More wheatgrass, Lorraine.
- Lorraine: Absolutely! What did you do?
- Archie Andrews: Blood, sweat, and tears, Lorraine. That's all it takes.
- Lorraine: This is amazing. I am so happy for you.
- Denise: Is this yours?
- Archie Andrews: Yeah, that's mine.
- Denise: What, did you win the fucking lottery or something?
- Archie Andrews: Not literally.
- Denise: Your boyfriend can afford gas, Lorraine. That's quite a catch.
- Archie Andrews: I'm not her boyfriend.
- Denise: No? Gosh, I'd give anything to ride in a car.
- Archie Andrews: Uh, sure, I can give you a ride.
- Denise: What's your name?
- Archie Andrews: Archie.
- Denise: I'm Denise. I love riding in cars.
- Lorraine: What about the meat stand?
- Denise: Meat sells itself, Lorraine. I want to ride in a fucking car.
- Car Jacker: Start driving, motherfucker!
- Archie Andrews: Oh! Okay!
- Car Jacker: The fuck wrong with you? What you doing, window-shopping in the ghetto?
- Archie Andrews: No. I was just thinking.
- Car Jacker: Wrong part of town to be thinking here, motherfucker. Probably thinking about buying some pussy. Keep driving.
- Archie Andrews: What are you doing?
- Car Jacker: Shut the fuck up! Think I get to ride around in cars, listen to the radio and shit? Do you? Fuck no, I don't!
- Archie Andrews: Do you want to just take the car?
- Car Jacker: Shut the fuck up and drive, nigga.
- Archie Andrews: You can take the car.
- Car Jacker: What sense that make, huh? You got maybe an eight of a tank. If I take this car and drive and run out of gas, what am I gonna do, fill it up? What, this is a 12-gallon tank, ain't it?
- Archie Andrews: I don't know.
- Car Jacker: What size, motherfucker?
- Archie Andrews: I don't...
- Car Jacker: Ten-gallon? Twelve-gallon? What?
- Archie Andrews: Yeah, 12. Twelve gallons. I'm positive, it's 12.
- Car Jacker: Why you just didn't say that?
- Archie Andrews: I don't... I don't know. I don't know.
- Car Jacker: It's like 12 gallons at 35 dollars and 50 cents, about 36 dollars a gallon. If I fill it up, it's like 450 dollars. Now, I can't...
- Archie Andrews: No, it's not quite 400...
- Car Jacker: Yes, it is, nigga! It's like 440 or 450! Do the math!
- Archie Andrews: I did the math, that's incorrect.
- Car Jacker: What? You got a calculator? Give me a calculator.
- Archie Andrews: No, I don't have a calculator. I have a pencil. Will that work?
- Car Jacker: What? "Will that work?" Hell yeah, it'll work. Think a nigga can't do his timetables and shit? Well, at 36 a gallon, it's pretty damn close.
- Archie Andrews: But not quite, right?
- Car Jacker: Well, pull into this motherfucking gas station, and let's fill this bitch up, man.