Teacher's Pet (TV Series)

Muttamorphosis (2000)

Nathan Lane: Spot Helperman

Quotes 

• Leonard Amadeus Helperman : [Reads collar]  Spot Helperman? What have you done to my dog?

  Spot Helperman : That's what I have been trying to tell you, Leonard. I am your dog!

• Spot Helperman : I'm a dog. I stay home and bite my buttocks.

• Scott Leadready II : I'm a boy, not a dog. A boy, not a dog. Don't blow it now, they wouldn't understand.

• Leonard Amadeus Helperman : You... you can talk!

  Spot Helperman : Yes I can, Leonard.

  [He licks Leonard's face] 

  Leonard Amadeus Helperman : How long?

  Spot Helperman : The whole time.

  Leonard Amadeus Helperman : And Pretty Boy? Mr. Jolly?

  Spot Helperman : Mm-hm. All of us.

• Spot Helperman : I am going to school!

  Mr. Jolly : Gasp! Out there? You can't!

  Spot Helperman : Oh, can't I?

• Mr. Jolly : Oh dear, oh me, you're going against nature.

  [Spot picks a flea out from his fur] 

  Spot Helperman : Nature invented the flea.

  [He squishes the flea] 

  Spot Helperman : What care I for nature?

  Pretty Boy : You're a real piece of work.