Family Guy (TV Series)

Peterotica (2006)

Seth MacFarlane: Peter Griffin, Brian Griffin, Stewie Griffin, Glenn Quagmire, Carter Pewterschmidt, Kool-Aid Guy, Ted Turner, Jude Law, Mall Clerk, Unknown Voice

Photos 

Quotes 

• Carter Pewterschmidt : You look familar.

  Gardener : I was your gardener for twelve years.

  Carter Pewterschmidt : Oh. You look different without my lawn under you.

  Gardener : I don't take the lawn with me when I go.

  Carter Pewterschmidt : Well, I was right to trust you with it then.

• Peter Griffin : [to Carter]  I promise, you'll love it here, even more than Julia Roberts loves herself.

  [cut to Julia Roberts, standing in front of a display of candles] 

  Julia Roberts : Hi, I'm Julia Roberts. You know, a lot of people died in the tsunami, but don't worry, I didn't. And I'll be here to entertain you and love my life for many, many years to come. Me! ME! MEEEEEEE!

  [hugs herself and laughs uncontrollably] 

• Carter Pewterschmidt : What do you want, homo?

• Book Customer : Hi. Would you be offended if I told you your prose suggests the male working class version of Emily Bronte?

  Peter Griffin : No. Would you be offended if I said I'd like to use your ass as a bongo drum?

  Book Customer : Yes.

  Peter Griffin : Well, then we are on two different wavelengths.

• Kool-Aid Guy : [car crashes into his house]  Wow. You know, from the other side, that's kind of annoying.

• Carter Pewterschmidt : When you're rich, you don't own your possessions. Your possessions own you.