You Can't Do That on Television (TV Series)

Sexual Equality (1981)

Christine McGlade: Old woman

Quotes 

• [Cowboy Kevin is tied to railroad tracks] 

  Kevin Kubusheskie : Save me! Save me!

  [Southern belle Christine arrives] 

  Christine McGlade : Oh, don't worry your pretty little head, my little flower. I'm here to save you now.

  Kevin Kubusheskie : Oh, good. Untie me and I shall be your slave forever.

  Christine McGlade : [pinching his cheek]  My little pea-blossom of the plantation.

  Kevin Kubusheskie : [as she starts untying the ropes]  Who wrote THIS? I mean, haven't we got the roles revered? Shouldn't I be saving YOU?

  Christine McGlade : Wadda you mean?

  Kevin Kubusheskie : I mean, everyone knows it's the woman who's helplessly tied up and the strong, virile young hero in the white cowboy suit comes and saves her.

  Christine McGlade : Just, uh, what're you getting at?

  Kevin Kubusheskie : Well, it's just that women are the helpless ones who always need MEN to get them out of messes. That's all.

  Christine McGlade : [witheringly]  Oh, really?

  Kevin Kubusheskie : Yeah, everyone knows THAT.

  Christine McGlade : Okay, buster, if you're so strong and I'm so "helpless," then you can untie yourself.

  Kevin Kubusheskie : Well, wait a minute. What about the train?

  Christine McGlade : [as an approaching train can be head]  Train? Oh! It should be coming along any minute.

  [a train whistle blows] 

  Kevin Kubusheskie : [simply]  Help.