(2006 Video)

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2/10
Staged sexual Romp with Screech from Saved by the Bell
ktwebb6830 December 2006
Diamond's attempt at generating some publicity as his dismal career continues.

Dustin Diamond, of Saved by the Bell fame, if you want to call that fame, self shoots a home video under the premise that two girls on a bachelorette party night, want him as the prime entertainment for the evening. The setup is these girls saw him do a show and asked him to come see them after, in their hotel room.

The video starts with Diamond speaking into the camera as he holds it giving the audience, which is supposed to be his buddies assumably, what might happen next at this party. He enters the room and almost immediately starts to look and comment about the sex toys. Which of course gets the action started as the girls are supposed to be drunk. Fellatio, girl/girl and intercourse with Diamond included ensue. Puntuated at the end by a Dirty Sanchez on one of the girls. Throughout Diamond is making inane and ridiculous commentary along the lines of "woohoo" "unleash the beast" etc, etc.. Apparently, if this is his real personality, he is as boring as his SbtB character Screech, from which the video title is derived.

It's fairly clear, fairly early in the video, that this is staged and considering Diamonds career took a nose dive after the kiddie sitcom and has never made it off the mat, who could blame him for trying to get something, anything, going. Unfortunately, the girls he manages to get for this video, almost certain strippers but just as certainly B or even C grade strippers, can't keep this interesting. If you mute out Diamonds pathetic color commentary I suppose it's watchable, if nothing more than seeing a D list celebrity in a sex video. The novelty of it wears off almost immediately however if you have the volume up.

So watch it if you have a friend that got it free or something but certainly do not pay money to see this feeble attempt at maintaining some celebrity for a never was like Dustin Diamond.
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4/10
a case against directing while performing
delphiaa10 June 2010
Where many so-called sex tapes go, this piece of work is not as bad as expected. Dustin Diamond comes off a tad cooler than his naive Screech character. It doesn't mean much, while he's put a lot of work to being an obnoxious, wise ass, wanna be tough guy.

It starts off with a thankfully short scene of Diamond alone in a bath tub, with someone else "directing".

To the action. The women are good looking for a man like Dustin. If the back story is to be believed, Dustin and his friends compete to see how many women they can pick up and get laid. Again, if the dialogue in the tape is credible, Diamond picked them up after a comedy show he did. So a few things could be at work. The women could be hookers, which is why they consent to the videotaped screwing with a man they just met. Another is they are groupies who recognized Diamond from his Screech days, or they're just comedy club sluts who go home with anyone who went on stage.

He's no stud, but as in professional heterosexual porn, it's technically not supposed to be about the men, but the women. Diamond must be a watcher of bad amateur porn or something, cause he went with the first person hand-held camera gimmick. He moves back and forth between the babes which shakes the camera and stimulates motion sickness. The nice hotel room, good light and quality video can't make that better.
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8/10
Funny maybe, witty, no
jwmcchurch3 February 2007
Just seeing screech hitting on two women is worth watching this movie. Some of his comments are funny, but most are stupid. As for being staged maybe, but how many staged films would take the time to mess up a hotel room as bad as they did on this film. It looks as if there was a party in the room before Screech arrived. This movie lulls in some places, but the comedy picks right up again. The only thing I am left wondering though, when he mentions the little game him and the boys have and he mentions Mark, is that Mark-Paul Gosselaar? Only Screech knows. The girls are cute not hot, but hey it is Dustin Diamond. You know the money he made of this movie might just have saved his house from being repossessed. More power to you D'man.
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