- David Martin: I hope you aren't expecting a lot from Santa. A federal offense probably puts you on the naughty list this year.
- [first lines]
- Trudie: [narrating] I'm not crazy. I'm a long way from crazy. Doing one crazy thing does not make a person crazy, though I have to admit this isn't how I expected to be spending my Christmas... and I'm sure it's not how David Martin planned on spending his.
- [to David who is walking down a snow-covered road in the middle of nowhere]
- Trudie: So, you've been walking for what, about an hour? And you've gone exactly 1.8 miles and the nearest gas station is 20 miles away - you do the math. Look, why don't you come back to the house, we'll make some hot chocolate, okay?
- [David climbs into Trudie's car]
- David Martin: You... are... the devil!
- Trudie: There may not be such a thing as a perfect job, a perfect life or a perfect family, but there is such a thing as a perfect moment. So I take back what I said. Doing one crazy thing probably does make you crazy, but it also can make you happy.
- [Trudie attempts to abduct David using Taj's antique pistol]
- David Martin: What the hell is that?
- Trudie: It's a gun.
- David Martin: Are you sure?
- Trudie: Oh, Lucy, I completely blew the interview. I can't believe I have to go home today; there's going to be no place to hide. My mother wanted this to be a special Christmas so she rented a cabin in the middle of nowhere. We're going to be trapped like "The Shining."
- Trudie: I still have one more chance for survival - Nick's coming with me.
- Taj: Table 2 wants their check. Table 2.
- Lucy: What? That's a little fast, isn't it?
- Trudie: Well, it's been a couple of months. Besides I have nothing to offer these people - no husband, no grandchildren. My dad even thinks I'm a lesbian.
- Lucy: So you're using Nick to get your parents off your back.
- Trudie: Yes - No! He's just great at first impressions. I don't know what you have against him.
- Lucy: I guess elitist jackasses aren't my type; they aren't yours, either.