Everybody Hates Chris (TV Series)

Everybody Hates Math (2007)

Tichina Arnold: Rochelle

Quotes 

• Rochelle : [to Chris]  Hey, baby. I thought you had to work today.

  Chris : I asked Doc for the day off.

  Rochelle : Why? What's wrong?

  Chris : Algebra. We have this pizza day coming up and we can't win unless I bring up my test score.

  Rochelle : Is that how they get you to pass your classes these days, is by giving you pizza? I guess if they gave you steak, you'd be headed to class.

  Narrator : And if they gave you chicken, you'd open up the Apollo.

• Rochelle : You know, your grandmother was a great algebra teacher.

  Chris : Oh, that's right. I forgot about that. So you think she can work with me?

  Rochelle : You could work with me. I know algebra like the back of my hand.

  Narrator : Which will probably end up upside my head.

• Chris : You know, maybe Grandma can help me. We could call her.

  Rochelle : No, because she's gonna to tell you the same thing. If you can add and subtract, you can do this.

  Narrator : My mother applied that logic to a lot of situations.

  Rochelle : [scene cuts Chris and his family in a bank vault dressed as bank robbers]  If you can crack an egg, you can crack a safe!

  [scene cuts to Rochelle and Drew are in a hospital dressed as surgeons] 

  Rochelle : Boy, if you can lace up a sneaker, you could stitch up a chest.

  [to another surgeon] 

  Rochelle : Suture.

  [scene cuts Rochelle and Tonya are on a plane dressed as skydivers] 

  Rochelle : If you can jump rope, you could jump from the plane! Go! Go!

  [Tonya jumps out of the plane without her parachute] 

  Rochelle : Oh, baby, you forgot your parachute!

• Rochelle : [When Rochelle finds out that Maxine has been tutoring Chris in math]  Chris, how come you just didn't say something instead of sneaking around? What else are you learning on the side? English? Science? History? Where does it stop?

  Narrator : One day, she caught me speaking Latin and kicked me out of the house.

• Chris : Ma? Are you okay?

  Rochelle : I'm fine.

  Chris : You're not mad?

  Rochelle : No. Why would you think that?

  Narrator : Because those mashed potatoes just started bleeding.

• Rochelle : God, Chris, what kind of answer is that?

  Narrator : The kind you come up with, with a crazy woman screaming at you.

• Maxine : [to Rochelle]  See, that's another thing. You don't listen.

  Rochelle : If he just did what I said, we wouldn't have a problem!

  Narrator : I did what you said. That's why we're here.

  Maxine : Did you hear what I said? Better yet, do you hear yourself?

  Rochelle : Are you telling me I don't know what I'm doing?

  Narrator : Yes.