Steve Franken: Victor Mulhern

Quotes 

• Ann Romano : [to her piano teacher]  You mentioned something about a chimpanzee who could play the piano better than...

  Victor Mulhern : [laughing]  I'm sorry I said that.

  Ann Romano : But you're not taking it back.

  [the teacher laughs nervously] 

  Ann Romano : Tell me it's not true.

  [he laughs even more] 

  Ann Romano : Ooooh, it's, ah, true.

  Victor Mulhern : Yeah, it's true. Uh, don't feel bad. It took that chimp eighteen months to learn one simple thing.

  Ann Romano : What could he play?

  [the teacher sighs, slowly walks to the piano and plays the opening notes from Beethoven's Fifth symphony, something Ann had done on her first day of playing] 

  Ann Romano : I can play that.

  Victor Mulhern : Hanging from the chandelier with a banana in one hand?