I Am Not Okay with This (TV Series)
Stan by Me (2020)
Wyatt Oleff: Stanley Barber
Photos
Quotes
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Stanley Barber : Are you a good bowler?
Sydney Novak : No.
Stanley Barber : Than what are you doin' here?
Sydney Novak : Gotta... try to make the lasagna.
Stanley Barber : That sounds vaguely... sexual.
Sydney Novak : No, it's not.
Stanley Barber : Okay.
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[finished dressing for the party, Stanley finds his father has returned]
Stanley Barber : Oh. You're home.
Stanley Barber's Dad : You look like a faggot.
Stanley Barber : [pause] Great talk, Dad.
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Stanley Barber : [trying to determine the origin point of Sydney's power via comic book stories] So have you experienced any of the following: Uh... spider bite?
Sydney Novak : No.
Stanley Barber : Okay. Radioactive goo?
Sydney Novak : No.
Stanley Barber : Alien gemstones?
Sydney Novak : No.
Stanley Barber : Okay. What about secret military experiment?
Sydney Novak : No.
Stanley Barber : Bionic limb transplant?
Sydney Novak : What?
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Sydney Novak : I actually... kissed someone who... d-didn't wanna be kissed... and I felt like an idiot. It almost always comes out when I'm angry... or embarrassed or... scared.
Stanley Barber : [has an idea] Okay.
Stanley Barber : [stands and offers his hand to get Sydney up from the floor] Come on. I think I know why they didn't kiss you back. Because you're incredibly ugly. Repulsive, actually - and I'm not even counting the zits.
Sydney Novak : [smiling and chuckling] You know that I-I see what you're doing, Stan.
Stanley Barber : And you wanna know something that's even more embarrassing than being ugly? Flunking biology, which you are most definitely gonna do. I mean, Martin Ganza passed biology, and he thinks cyborgs staged the moon landing.
Sydney Novak : Okay, so I'm ugly, I'm dumb. Wait, s'that all you got?
Stanley Barber : You wanna know the scary thing? You're never gonna figure this out. You'll never know what the hell's going on inside you, or what the hell's wrong with you, and that's gonna eat you up inside. You'll never have answers, and that's gonna haunt you for as long as you live - and that's gonna suck. Yeah, it will.
[notices bowling balls beginning to move on their own]
Stanley Barber : But nothing will ever suck as much as your shitty family.
[balls levitate]
Stanley Barber : For starters, let's talk about your dad. I hear he didn't even leave a note. And you wanna know something? You'll never know why he killed himself.
[bowling balls attack]
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Stanley Barber : [after several failed attempts to test Sydney's power] Okay, so how does it... how does it normally happen? Like... after Ricky's party, what was... what was your mindset?
Sydney Novak : I didn't have a mindset.
Stanley Barber : Okay, but were you just having fun and then you just blew down some trees, or...
Sydney Novak : I, um... kind of... kissed someone at the party.
Stanley Barber : [sighs] Oh.
[pause]
Stanley Barber : When, like, b... before or after I asked you to homecoming?
Sydney Novak : Uh, did you think we were... together?
Stanley Barber : I think, we did... you know, at my house that one night. I...
[pause]
Stanley Barber : ... t... never done that before.
Sydney Novak : M'either.
Stanley Barber : Right, so... this person you kissed - and I'm not gonna ask who, because I'm above it and I don't care; not even the least bit jealous - but, just tell me - does he dress cooler than me?
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Sydney Novak : The only thing I inherited was pasty skin and my bubbly personality.
Stanley Barber : And the thigh zits.
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Stanley Barber : Do you wanna know the scary thing? You're never gonna figure this out. You'll never know what the hell's going on inside you. Or what the hell's wrong with you. And that's gonna eat you up inside. You'll never have answers, and that's gonna haunt you for as long as you live.
