- [first lines]
- Henry Hart: Why do we always stay all night when we go to Messy's All-Night Barbecue?
- Charlotte Page: Why do you guys always buy those t-shirts?
- Piper Hart: And why do you always buy them BEFORE we eat?
- Jasper Dunlop: If you need to talk to Captain Man, why don't you just call his hotline?
- Chapa: I can't.
- Charlotte Page: Sure you can.
- Henry Hart: Twenty-four hours.
- Piper Hart: What's your number? I'll send it out for you.
- Chapa: I don't have a phone, okay? I'm phoneless.
- [Charlotte and Piper gasp]
- Piper Hart: You poor thing. Phonelessness is a big problem here in Swellview.
- Captain Man: [entering with a smudged face] Sorry I'm late. I was... stopping a meteor from destroying the Earth, which you can see by... my face.
- Kid Danger: You smell like burnt toast.
- Captain Man: Well, that's what meteors smell like.
- Kid Danger: Well, that can't be true.
- Captain Man: Ah, you weren't there.
- Kid Danger: Well, you're an idiot, so...
- Kid Danger: Is that him? Is that the boy that stole your phone?
- Chapa: I can't tell.
- Captain Man: Good enough for me. Let's melt his face and go home.
- Chapa: Who is that... man-baby?
- Captain Man: That's no man. It's The Toddler. And don't call me "baby."
- Chapa: Don't act like a baby and I won't have to... baby.
- Kid Danger: Ooo, Chapa with the fire clapback.
- Dr. Minyak: Well, come and get it. And by "it" I mean a thrashing, a tolly-whopping, a tub-thumping, a two-fisted toodaloo!
- Captain Man: Not tonight, Minyak.
- [brandishing his fists]
- Captain Man: Get ready to eat Big Mac and The Whopper!