- Wanda Dollard: [to Lacey] Before you drop your dacks, what's the specials?
- [later]
- Wanda Dollard: Before you ditch your britches, what's the soup?
- Wanda Dollard: [to Hank who is wearing workout gear] Hey, Olivia, the new comics are in.
- Hank Yarbo: Oh thanks.
- [pause]
- Hank Yarbo: Olivia?
- Wanda Dollard: Newton-John? 'Let's Get Physical'?
- Hank Yarbo: Oh. No, not right now, I'm about to work out.
- Davis Quinton: [at spin class] I thought this was suppose to start at noon. Where's the teacher?
- Hank Yarbo: You're looking at him.
- Davis Quinton: [gesturing to the guy he was looking at] That guy?
- Hank Yarbo: No, I thought you'd be looking at me when I said that.
- Karen Pelly: Oh, so you're the teacher?
- [pause]
- Karen Pelly: Oh my god, you're the teacher?
- Lacey Burrows: "Scantily clad"? What are you, 70?
- Fitzy's Grandma: 74, but that's sweet of you to say.
- Lacey Burrows: So, no more spinning class for you?
- Hank Yarbo: Nah, I gave it up. Felt like I wasn't going anywhere.
- Lacey Burrows: How'd you get that job anyway?
- Hank Yarbo: You know, everyone asks me that. Let me tell ya, it's quite the story.
- [fade, stinger music plays, exterior shot of the Ruby, then immediately cutting back to Hank and Lacey]
- Lacey Burrows: Wow, that is quite a story.
- Hank Yarbo: And to think it all started with a tornado and a cat!
- Davis Quinton: [entering] Hey, is this the story about how Hank became the spinning instructor?
- Lacey Burrows: Yeah!
- Karen Pelly: How did you get that job anyway?
- Davis Quinton: You haven't heard this?
- Karen Pelly: No.
- Hank Yarbo: I was at home watching a TV show about a tornado and a cat, when they called me up and asked if I wanted to be a spinning instructor.
- Karen Pelly: [unimpressed] Wow.
- Hank Yarbo: Yeah! I mean, you can't make this stuff up!
- [Hank and Karen are sitting at the counter in the Ruby]
- Lacey Burrows: What can I get you guys?
- Hank Yarbo: Um, I'll have the tofu salad, but replace the tofu with chicken.
- Lacey Burrows: So, the chicken salad?
- Hank Yarbo: Oh, no, it's not as healthy.
- Davis Quinton: Spin class? Cool!
- Karen Pelly: That's right, I'm doing something about it. Maybe you'd like to join me.
- Davis Quinton: Sure! Do they supply the plates or do you bring your own?
- Karen Pelly: Not that kind of spinning. It's on a bike.
- Davis Quinton: Ooh, like the circus!
- [trying to motivate his spin class students]
- Hank Yarbo: OK, let's hold this pace. It helps if you visualize. Imagine you're at the Tour de France, watching from the sidelines on a stationary bike. C'mon Davis, you're not gonna watch someone win the Tour de France like that!
- [Karen, wanting to prove she's not a teachers pet, tries to pull a prank on Hank but gets the rest of the class in trouble instead]
- Karen Pelly: Look, I'm sorry! What was I supposed to do? Stay in detention even if I didn't have to?
- Davis Quinton: Yes.
- Karen Pelly: Okay, wait. Check this out. Would a teacher's pet do this?
- [she pulls out a bar of soap, writes on Hank's windshield: "Mr. Yarbo is a dic-", he catches her before she can finish]
- Hank Yarbo: Karen! Is that what you think I am? A dictator?