Superstore (TV Series)

Zephra Cares (2020)

Kaliko Kauahi: Sandra

Quotes 

• Sandra : I feel like Zephra cares.

  Jonah : Well, let's not just blindly believe the T-shirts.

  [off Amy's look] 

  Jonah : Although Zephra is a fine company which I am not criticizing today as was made clear to me in the car.

• Sandra : You have five minutes to tell Amy, or I will.

  Jonah : Tell Amy what?

  Sandra : How you were flirting with that lady. Turning each other's cranks. I thought you two were gonna do it right here on the belt.

  Jonah : Oh, come on, Sandra. I was just being friendly. Customers appreciate a little, you know, human connection.

  Sandra : Ugh. Close your legs, Jonah.

  Jonah : My legs are fine, and if anything, we should be a little friendlier than usual today to get people to round up for charity.

  Sandra : Not if it means betraying the woman you love. Trust me, I'm married now. Don't you dream about someday having what Jerry and I have?

  Jonah : Of course... Well, exactly what you and Jerry... It's fine, Sandra.

  [to female customer] 

  Jonah : Hi. How's it going? Hope you didn't have any trouble finding those toe warmers.

  Sandra : [to herself]  He's gonna die alone.

• Jonah : [Jonah wants to show Sandra how to be friendly with the customers, so they will donate to the charity]  Hey, Sandra, aren't these your favorite kind of chips?

  Sandra : Yes. I love these chips.

  Male Customer : Oh. Cool.

  Sandra : Uh-huh. You're a lucky man. And these, um, are some lucky chips 'cause they get to take a ride in that hot little mouth of yours. Nope. Oh, my God. I have to call Jerry.

  [on the phone] 

  Sandra : Jerry? Jonah made me seduce a man.

• Sandra : Jerry. You didn't have to come. I told you to forget about it.

  Jerry : I did, but then I remembered again.

  Jonah : Hey, Jerry.

  Jerry : Sandra told me you tried to make her do stuff with men for money.

  Jonah : What... Oh, oh. Earlier today? No, that was... That was just talking.

  Jerry : [deadpan]  Let me make myself perfectly clear. I don't like that.

  Sandra : Jerry, please calm down. I've never seen him this angry.

  Jerry : [still deadpan]  If you ever mess with my marriage again, I will hate it.

  Jonah : Got it. Understood.

  Jerry : Sandra, could you bring home some magazines? Bye, Jonah.

  Sandra : Bye, Jer. Take notes, Jonah. That's marriage material. And yes, he reads magazines.