- Chloe and Lucifer investigate a mini-golf murder. Lucifer, Michael, Amenadiel and Linda prepare for the holiest of family dinners.
- When a dutiful son dies at his family' mini-golf business, Chloe and Lucifer investigate. Meanwhile, God asks his sons to join him for a family dinner and is disappointed when Lucifer says what he really thinks. Linda drinks a lot of wine and understands why everything tastes like chicken.—Gislef
- In the time-frozen station, the celestials stare at God, and then retract their wings. He says that they have His attention, and Michael claims that the others were attacking him. Lucifer tells his father to go ahead and blame it all on him, and Amenadiel says that it's his fault and as the eldest brother, he should have kept a better handle on his siblings.
God tells them that He doesn't care who is at fault, and just wants his sons to get along. He reminds them that they're family, and they should act like it. Michael goes over and hugs Amenadiel, and then tries to hug Lucifer. Lucifer refuses, saying that Michael impersonated him and tried to ruin his life and is behind every bad thing that has happened to him. Lucifer tells God that He's never seen it, and apparently never will despite His
Disgusted, Lucifer walks away. Mae is looking out from behind a desk wondering if she should attack, and Michael motions to her to stay hidden. Meanwhile, God goes over and looks at Charlie, his grandson. He unfreezes time and Linda wonders who the man holding Charlie is.
In the store room, Chloe reverts to normal time and finds herself alone. A police woman comes in and asks if Chloe is okay, figuring that an earthquake happened. Chloe goes out to the squad room to find Lucifer, but he's nowhere to be found.
At Lux, Lucifer is playing the piano for the dancing crowd. Chloe arrives and approaches Lucifer after he finishes his number. They talk privately, and Chloe asks what happened. Lucifer says that he had to get away, and couldn't take people telling him what to do. He assures her that she isn't "people", and Chloe says that she'll give him some time and will be ready to listen when he's ready to talk.
At the house, Linda pokes God to make sure He's real. She says that she's never going to get used to it, and God tells her that Linda can poke all she want because He's eternally grateful to her for Charlie. Linda goes to get drinks, Amenadiel tells God that Lucifer was right and Michael is up to something. God says that it isn't important, and family is important. Amenadiel wants to talk about whether Charlie is a celestial. God avoids the question, and says that he knows what their family needs.
Later, Chloe meets with Dan and says that he should take some time off after learning the truth about Lucifer. They're at a mini-golf course, and Dan tells Chloe that she should take some time off. Chloe says that she's giving him some space, but they'll figure things out. Ella is at the crime scene, and tells the detectives that she needs to focus on the case and isn't going home. The detectives don't argue with her, much to Ella's surprise.
Ella tells them that the victim was Chris Peterson, who died on a hole and his head was bashed in. Ella thinks Chris slipped, fell, and hit his head, but isn't sure because his body was burned to a crisp. There was gasoline all over, and apparently someone was trying to burn down the entire course. However, the cement stopped the fire from spreading. The place is family-owned, so the dad and the kids run the place. The victim was the youngest son. The three other siblings were there working after hours, but didn't see a struggle or hear any arguments. They saw the family and found the victim's body.
The police technician tells the detectives that she knows how to find the killer, and all the detectives have to do is introduce her to all of the suspects. Whichever one she's most attracted to is the killer. Ella says that she might as well use her "broken picker" for the greater good.
From a distance, Lucifer watches Dan and Chloe together. God appears and asks Lucifer if he's going to say something romantic to Chloe. Lucifer asks his father why he cares, and points out that He is all-knowing, When Lucifer asks God why he's there, God tells him Earth is fine and came to invite Lucifer to a family dinner. Lucifer tell Him no, and God says that he doesn't want to leave Earth until they've all talked. Despite that, Lucifer still refuses.
Lucifer goes over to the detectives and says that he's where he needs to be. He figures one of the family is the killer, and once he leaves Chloe tells Dan that Lucifer is probably projecting his latest issues. She figures Lucifer is upset with his own family rather than her, and goes off after Lucifer leaving Dan alone.
Lucifer and Chloe talk to the siblings, and April Peterson says that their father peter built his mini-golf empire from the ground up and they all have a role in keeping the place running. Chris left a few years back to work for himself, and Lucifer suggests that she killed. Surprised, April denies it and says that they were all still close, and Chris died protecting the mini-golf course.
Larry Peterson says that Juan Perez would want burn the place down, and Perez is the owner of the Hole in Juan, a competitor. Ted Peterson chimes in and says that they've pranked each other for years, and things escalated recently vowing that he would destroy them.
Lucifer and Chloe got to Hole in Juan, and Chloe tells Lucifer that she's glad he thinks somebody in the family killed Chris. She says that she's there for Lucifer if he wants to talk about his own family. They find Perez and he immediately runs when Chloe identifies herself. He tries to drive off in one of his park's carts cars, but Lucifer casually holds up the end so it can't go anywhere. Lucifer then pulls Perez out and he's surprised when Chloe tells him that Chris is dead. Perez explains that he ran because he thought they were going to arrest him for using a booster chemical in his carts' fuel. Chloe asks why he threatened the Peterson kingdom, and Perez says that they think they're better than him, He has an alibi for the time Chris was murdered, and says that Chris came there looking for a job. Perez says that he would never employ a Peterson, and figured Chris was a spy.
After Perez leaves, Chloe wonders why Chris left the family business and wanted a job with Perez. They go to the station and call in Chris' girlfriend Betty, who says that mini-golf was all Chris knew. She explains that try as he might, Chris couldn't get away from miniature golf. When Lucifer suggests that Chris didn't go to his family because they're dysfunctional garbage, Betty agrees and they lied when they said they got along great with Chris. Chris couldn't stand being around any of them. She didn't know Chris had applied with Perez for a job, but figures that it makes sense because he would never go back to his family's "kingdom" and would rather burn it down. Lucifer says he tried to do the same with Heaven, and Chloe tells Lucifer privately that he might be right and someone in the family killed Chris.
God is at the house cutting vegetables when Maze sneaks in. He knows that she's there and greets her, and says that he's been waiting for her. God offers her a drink and she unconvincingly says that it's okay. He tells her that she can ask Him what she came to ask, and Maze asks Him to give her a soul. God asks why she wants one, and she says that without one she can't "connect" and is alone. He says that she's perfect just the way she is, and he can't help her. Maze angrily figures that He won't help her and reveals her demon face, and God assures her that she is herself and he's never change that.
Maze tells God that she thinks he messed up when he made demons, including her, and he doesn't want to admit His mistake. With that, Maze storms out.
Lucifer is practicing his putting at the precinct, and Amenadiel comes in and Lucifer tells him that he's solving an important case about mini-golf. Amenadiel points out their father is there, and He wants to see them. The angel figures that they can finally get some answers from God, but Lucifer doesn't believe it. Amenadiel says that he'd like to see Lucifer at the dinner as a gesture, and thinks they should seriously consider going. Lucifer tells Amenadiel that he was doing well being his own man, but is reverting.
Amenadiel accuses Lucifer of pouring when God showed up, and admits that God has been a real ass to them. However, He's their father. Lucifer says that God will never admit to being anything less than perfect. Amenadiel gives up and leaves.
Dan visits Ella in her lab and finds it clean. Ella is polishing beakers, and says that she thought she'd clean up while waiting for lab results. She insists that she's fine and Dan says that the killer had them all fooled. Ella isn't convinced, and Dan says that he's been through something similar that someone wasn't who he thought they were. He tells Ella that she puts herself out and gets hurt as a result, but she puts a lot of love out into the world and asks her not to let what she's been through change that. Dan says that they need more people like Ella, not less.
Lucifer continues putting, and Chloe proposes him and says that she has a new theory. Chris tries to burn down the kingdom, and a sibling found him, they had a fight, and Chris ended up dead. She asks Lucifer who he thinks the killer is if he was Chris, and suggests Michael. Lucifer wonders why she's bringing his father into it, and Chloe points out that he's having family issues and she thought she would use resolving the murder to help him. Lucifer agrees and they go off to find "their Michael" among the Petersons.
Chloe and Lucifer question April, Larry, and Ted, who all say that they were one big happy family. Lucifer figures they're all lying, and Lucifer accuses them of ruining their brother's life. They all claim they were working the night of the murder, and they can corroborate each other. However, they note that Ted wasn't there the entire night. Ted says that they should talk to April, who disappeared for a while. April admits that she was smoking pot to deal with her brothers, and soon they start accusing each other.
Lucifer steps out to take a moment alone, and Chloe goes after him and points out that they might all be "Michaels", and they quickly turned on each other. Peter arrives and says that he killed Chris, and can't let any of his children suffer for his mistakes. He was at the kingdom the night of the murder, and saw Chris take a gas can and tried to stop him. They fought, and Chris accidentally slipped and fell. Peter admits that he killed his son.
Once an officer takes Peter away to get his statement, Chloe asks Lucifer if he's okay. He says that he is, and now he knows what he needs to do.
At their house, Amenadiel and Linda prepare the family dinner. Michael is there as well, and they sit down with God. Lucifer arrives late with soufflé, sits down a comfortable distance away from Michael, and God tells him that He's glad Lucifer came. Linda pours wine, and then starts to leave. God asks her why she's going, and assures her that she's the mother of His grandchild and she's family.
Lucifer insists that they say grace, and Linda agrees to say it when no one else does. She awkwardly thanks God for the food and company, and everything else, until Lucifer cuts her off. They start eating, and Michael pointedly ignores Lucifer while passing the food. Lucifer compliments Michael on everything he's done, but figures Michael did it to bring the family together. Michael tells his brother that he won't let him ruin the dinner, and Lucifer thanks Amenadiel for persuading him to come and repeats his earlier words about saying God is an ass. Amenadiel claims he was trying to sympathize with Lucifer, and God tells Amenadiel that it's okay. Lucifer says that Amenadiel went through a lot of anguish thinking he had lost God's favor.
After Lucifer says that they were all being tortured, in the name of God's mysterious ways, he asks his father why Hell doesn't need a warden anymore. God merely says that he has a good reason, and Michael tells Lucifer that he got his own kingdom for bad behavior. Lucifer asks Michael if that's how he sees it, and says that he was still in Hell even if he was the king. He angrily tells his twin brother that Michael has no idea what it was like, and Michael had it easy.
Michael scoffs and says that it was worse sharing a face with Lucifer. Lucifer tells him that Michael has no one to blame but himself for who he is, and God finally yells at them to stop arguing as the lights go out and thunder cracks. The lights finally come back up and Lucifer says that's the Old Testament wrath and he wasn't sure God had it in him. God says that all he wanted was a nice family dinner, but that was too much to ask.
The twins sit back down, and Linda chuckles. She figures that everything tastes like chicken because it's God's favorite, and she's uncomfortable. Amenadiel apologizes to her for having to witness their dysfunctional family, and she says that it's wonderfully normal. It's just three sons who want their father's love and don't feel like they're getting it.
Lucifer says that he doesn't want God's love, but just admit that he's a bad father. Amenadiel says that Lucifer is being unfair, and Lucifer asks him if he would treat Charlie the same way God has treated them. Apologizing to God, Amenadiel says that he wouldn't and that he would do anything for Charlie. Lucifer says that even he and Michael agree that God has screwed them up.
God says that he's sorry Lucifer feels that way, and all he ever wanted to do was empower all of his children and let them make their own choices. Lucifer asks God for an answer to his question; does He love them? God tells them that if he has to tell them, he has failed. Amenadiel defends God's answer, and Lucifer points out that their father didn't say "yes". Disgusted, Lucifer says that he thought he would get catharsis, but he's realized that God will never love them because He's incapable of love... and that's just sad for all of them.
Lucifer leaves, and Linda asks for more wine.
The next day, Lucifer goes to the precinct and Ella's lab. They're going over video of Perez's arcade, and Chloe tells Lucifer that Peter's confession doesn't add up. There were traces of the additive in the gas that burned down the kingdom and Chris, so they figure Peter lied when he said he saw Chris take the gas can from the shed. Betty is in the background at the arcade on the surveillance tape, but she claimed she didn't know about Chris applying with Perez.
Dan comes in and says that Peter is running, after he bailed on house arrest. Lucifer and Chloe go to Union Station where Peter is heading according to his ankle monitor.
God and Amenadiel are washing dishes from the dinner in the kitchen, and Amenadiel asks his father if Charlie is mortal. He figures Charlie will suffer like all the humans, and asks God to take him and make Charlie an angel. God figures that Amenadiel would do anything for his son, and tells Amenadiel that fatherhood is never that easy.
Michael comes in and asks God if he's ready to go home. God asks Michael if he's ready, and when Michael says that it's his time his father tells him that he should go. He has decided to stay there a little longer, and Michael says that he'll stay with Him. God tells Michael that he doesn't think that would be a good idea, and that Michael is no longer welcome on Earth.
Amenadiel asks if God is banishing Michael, and God says that Michael is not being punished. Michael wonders why he's the one being punished. God tells him that he's not, and Michael leaves. As they look after the departing Michael, God tells Amenadiel that like he said earlier, fatherhood is never easy and then asks if they have a futon for him to sleep on.
Lucifer and Chloe go to Union Station and spot Peter going in. Peter runs when they see him, and he draws a gun and aims it at Betty. Peter uses Betty as a shield, as Chloe aims her gun at him and tells him to surrender. Chloe realizes that Peter was chasing Betty, and Peter says that Betty killed his son and he only confessed to murder because he thought one of his children was the real killer. He couldn't bear to lose another child, and says that fatherhood is willingness to sacrifice oneself for one's own children.
As Lucifer takes that in, Peter says that he talked to all his children and realized none of them had killed Chris. He went to Betty to see how she was doing, and found her leaving town. Betty says that Chris needed to get away from the kingdom so she tried to burn it down, Chris caught her, they struggled, and Chris died. The fire she started burned fast, destroying Chris' body, and Betty swears that she didn't mean for it to happen.
Peter realizes that Chris died protecting the family, and Lucifer says that self-sacrifice runs in the family. Chloe handcuffs Betty, and has Lucifer get the gun from Peter.
Later at Lux, Michael is at the bar drinking. Maze joins him and tells Michael that she was ready to beat him. Maze wonder why Michael isn't hiding, and wants the soul Michael promised her. Michael reminds her that he promised an audience with God, the one being who could give her a soul, and asks what arbitrary answer God gave her. Maze takes a bottle and says that God said she was perfect as she is. She figures Michael wanted her to find him, and he doesn't entirely hate Maze and he's sorry she didn't get what she wanted. Maze toast him when he toast her, and says that she's sorry he didn't get what he wanted. Michael says that it doesn't mean he won't, and says that it ain't over until it's over for either of them... and then disappears.
Lucifer goes to a fountain to ponder what he's learned, and Chloe finds him. She asks him that it turned out their killer was an overbearing woman trying to change her boyfriend because he couldn't deal with his family issues. She jokingly says that there are no parallels between that and what Lucifer is going through, and says that she's sorry that she didn't give Lucifer space and rushed him anyway. Lucifer assures her that she's been wonderful, and deserves to hear those three words. He tells Chloe that he'll never be able to say them to him, and has realized that he is his father's son. It means that like God, Lucifer is incapable of love. Lucifer apologizes and says that if he said the words to her, they'd be a lie.
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