User Reviews

This movie had no idea what it wanted to be. It started as a semi dark, quirky comedy. It wasn't funny exactly, but it was light hearted enough to keep me watching. Then it morphed into a dreary drama about relationships, cherishing the time you have and the people you're with, all while wasting what little good will they earned in the first half.

Nobody was actually funny, not that it mattered because every single person on screen was sleepwalking through their part. Rife was playing an undead being incapable of emotion so that was pretty much bang on.

Jamie Kennedy was mostly annoying. When he wasn't being not funny on stage, he was being shrill and/or morose off stage.

I gave it a 3 and that's probably a bit to high but I'm feeling especially generous today.

This is...so bad. Didn't laugh at all, in fact I cringed more than I laughed. Matt Rife's "acting" was horrible. I guess the only thing he has going for himself is that he is pale enough to be a vampire. A few washed up actors with bad acting, no good jokes. Highly recommend not watching this and instead watching a ~good~ vampire movie/show lol go check out Nick Cage's new vampire movie because even though it wasn't the best thing in the world, it was still a thousand times better than this.

Overall, please don't waste your time watching this. Watch something better. Let's please stop giving Matt Rife jobs.

This vanity project does one thing right, it proves Matt rife will never lead a real movie. Rife's acting is somehow worse than his crowd work and the plastic surgeries aren't helping. Jamie Kennedy sleep walks through the movie as well, reminding everyone why we don't see him very often in 2023. The jokes are weak, the film stars two comedians and is very light on any comedy. Rife's English accent is hilarious, it comes and goes and will fade during a single sentence. If you find Rife's comedy to be painfully unfunny, at least this movie is a little bit better. If "Renfield" is too scary or intelligent for you, this will definitely help put you to sleep. Watch with cocktails or other substances, it could possibly make it more enjoyable.

After seeing it's rating...I expected worse.

But it's not without it's faults.

The story revolves around a washed up comedian (played by Jamie Kennedy) who tries to rekindle his career by accepting a gig touring with a not-so-young up and comer (played by Matt Rife).

The young wannabe comic employs a dry shtick where he plays on being an ancient- yet ageless- vampire.

However, he's having a hard time connecting with the audience.

So he brings on Kennedy's character with the hope that he can get some tips on how to become a better comedian.

Promising to fund the entire endeavour, himself.

Only to reveal the truth behind the facade.

The whole thing is rather mediocre.

If only because Rife's portrayal of the vampire character is rather insufferable.

The rest of the cast actually do an excellent job, though.

Why many people didn't like it is obvious, however.

Because it comes off less a comedy than it does a drama.

Which is something I blame the writers for.

Because, where they had an oppourtunity to insert comedy into the script...they seem to glance over them, in order to focus on driving the dramatic aspect of the story forward.

Which is an odd decision.

Because there's not enough comedy to appease viewers who tuned in for some laughs.

And there's not enough gore to satiate those expecting a pure horror.

Making it completely reliant on winning people over with the drama.

Which is a mistake in my opinion.

Especially considering Rife does such an awful job.

His terrible performance aside...it's not totally horrible.

Just very slow and dry.

Which is not something you would expect from a film that features such well known comics.

Thus, it's not particularly great.

So, you can't blame people for thinking it does, in fact, suck.

Because, in the end...it really is quite mediocre.

2 out of 10.

Ok yes I wanted to see this movie just because of Matt Rife and yes he is hot and yes he is cute but I did not watch this movie just for his eyes and smile. He actually played the role with heart and soul, And his humor was actually funny.

Also I enjoyed Jamie Kennedy in this movie. He made me laugh so hard my lungs were really killing me. I have not seen him in a movie in a while. I am glad he got to do a movie with a younger comedian. It's not often comedians have great acting together. They both matched up really well.

Also I really enjoyed the actress Ellen Hollman. I thought she played a cool character in this movie.

Started the last month of 2023 by finally renting Don't Suck on Apple TV yesterday. It was a true laugh-out-loud/entertaining indie horror/comedy due to RJ Collins' filmmaking, Rick D'Elia's screenwriting, the cinematography, soundtrack, production design, makeup/hairstyling, visual effects, and ensemble performances led by Jamie Kennedy, Elyssa Mai, Matt Rife, Jay Davis, Ellen Hollman, Russell Peters, Carrot Top, Jimmy Shubert, and the rest of the cast. If any of you are in LA, Austin, Dallas, Philly, Boston, Atlanta, and Tampa, be sure to please check out Don't Suck on the big screen to not only support the cast and crew who worked very hard in producing it but also support the art of cinema as well.

When I sat down to watch the 2023 comedy "Don't Suck", I had never actually heard about it. And I hadn't read the synopsis, but given the movie's cover, I did assume that I was in for a vampire movie.

However, I must say that the storyline in the movie turned out to be way more entertaining and enjoyable than I had anticipated. I figured I was in for something in the likes of a spoof or farce on the likes of "Twilight" and such, given the movie's cover. However, writer Rick D'Elia proved to come up with a rather nicely written comedy script that combined elements of living on the road as a stand-up comedian and vampire movies. There was just something that worked about quite nicely.

And I must say that I wasn't figuring that Jamie Kennedy would muster anything grand here, but I was pleasantly surprised with his performance as the down-on-his-luck-aging-comedian Pete. And I wasn't familiar with his co-star Matt Rife, playing Ethan the vampire, but he definitely put on a memorable and good performance as well. It should definitely be noted that teaming up Jamie Kennedy alongside with Matt Rife was a good choice, because they had a great on-screen chemistry.

I wasn't familiar with the majority of the cast ensemble in the movie, aside from Jamie Kennedy and Russell Peters. But I will say that the cast in general did put on good performances in bringing their characters to life on the screen.

If you enjoy odd comedies, then "Don't Suck" is a movie that is well-worth sitting down and checking out. I was genuinely surprised with the script that Rick D'Elia gave director RJ Collins to bring to the script. And I was adequately entertained throughout the course of the 100 minutes that the movie ran for.

My rating of "Don't Suck" lands on a six out of ten stars.

While this is no 10, it's not a 1 or a 2 either. I'm guessing that the 2-3 jokes about Biden (they were pretty tame) upset some snowflakes so they gave low scores. I don't know or care about Jamie Kenedy's politics but the jokes weren't mean, just jokes. This used to be normal but hollywood has everyone super sensitive these days. This movie won't break any new ground but it had some very funny parts. I also agree that Matt Rife (who I'd never seen before this) was the weakest link. But that's comedy, not everyone is going to be on your same wavelength.

If you like Kenedy, you'll like this, if a woman screaming F me Brandon while having sex puts you on tilt then rent a llama instead.

It's actually pretty funny and a good concept. Not slap stick humor or full of a lot of CGI. Matt plays the naive vampire well and definitely easy on the eyes. It's supposed to be the dingy underside of comedy and it is. The character development happens at a reasonable pace. If you must have really broad jokes and slapstick it's probably not for you. It's a good, watchable and funny film for those that understand nuance and subtle humor. A lot of good cameos from comedians past and present. It was great to see Jimmy Walker popping up for several scenes, as well as several good character actors.

Not sure why such low ratings and negative reviews when this movie was laugh out loud hilarious? Perhaps, those who left negative reviews were having an off day or not happy in general which is sad because comedy is meant to make people forget about those times for a while. This is not a paid advert and I am not an employee with the company who made this film. I do not know the history of the actors. All the actors are great in their roles. There was some very, very funny scenes. I had a good experience watching this and left with good sense of humor about life. It reminds me of Chris Rock style movies. If you want to have genuine good laugh then watch this film, especially for those having off days or not happy in general. Give it a chance 👍🤣😂