- Peggy Hill: Actors will be enacting a theme murder mystery and we get to solve it.
- Hank Hill: Theme?
- Peggy Hill: Yes, the theme is Studio 54: Death gets on the guest list.
- Hank Hill: Disco, huh? You sure they didn't have a Murder at the Super Bowl theme or Murder on a bass boat?
- Lucky: We've all messed up and given away the plot of something. Take it from me. "Fire" ain't the worst thing you can yell in a theater. It's "Bruce Willis is dead."
- Kahn Souphanousinphone Sr.: We have a mystery. Somebody did the nasty on this train and we are gonna find out who.
- Lucky: Lucky is on the case. That's usually what I say when I drink beer, but this time it refers to this mystery.
- Kahn Souphanousinphone Sr.: I will begin my questioning with you, Dale Gribble. Has your wife been out of your sight for even 5 minutes?
- Dale Gribble: No, she's been clingy all night.
- John Redcorn: I can verify that Nancy has not been out of Dale's sight at all.
- Bill Dauterive: I don't have an alibi.
- Kahn Souphanousinphone Sr.: You're Bill Dauterive, that's your alibi, airtight.