- Marshall Adams I: Reason number 157 why I love you: your unshakable will to live. Reason number 158 why I love you: your love for animals, real or fictional. Reason 159 why I love you: your sand paper tongue.
- Daniel Benjamin: As it turns out Shane is a musical prodigy who became a concert pianist at the age of twelve. He's here on full scholarship. He has Velcro shoes, and a full scholarship.
- Gopher Reed: Look Andy, I'm cool with you being straight and all. I just don't want to have to see it all the time.
- Shane Reilly: He made the choice.