Glee (TV Series)

Bad Reputation (2010)

Jane Lynch: Sue Sylvester

Photos 

Quotes 

• Brenda Castle : Well, look who it is. I thought I smelled a laughing stock.

  Sue Sylvester : Don't start with me Castle, or I will kick you square in the taco

  Brenda Castle , Sue Sylvester : It's a date. That's just a typical night in the Castle condo.

• Sue Sylvester : [from having "Physical" video posted online]  That video has received over a hundred and seventy thousand comments. I took the liberty of printing out a few

  Principal Figgins : [reading comment]  The man in this video looks like the champion cheerleading coach, Sue Sylvester.

  Sue Sylvester : That was particularly hurtful.

• Kurt Hummel : Coach Sylvester, can I have just a minute of your time?

  Sue Sylvester : What do you want, ladyface?

  Kurt Hummel : You're aware a tape was leaked onto the Internet, causing you to become a national laughingstock? We stole the tape from your syringe and pill drawer. We posted it online. We'll accept whatever punishment you see fit.

  Sue Sylvester : So it was you. I can't thank you enough.

  [Kurt looks around at the others, confused; cut to them in a classroom] 

  Artie Abrams : She wasn't angry at all. It was weird.

  Tina Cohen-Chang : Maybe the comments online have gotten so mean, people have started to feel sorry for her. She's finally getting some sympathy, so she's in a forgiving mood.

• Sue Sylvester : [passing Schue in the hall]  Hey, man-whore.

  Brenda Castle : Will Schuester?

  Will Schuester : Yeah.

  Brenda Castle : I'm Brenda Castle. I'm the new astronomy teacher and badminton coach. I also happen to be an alcoholic, and... I like pills. I hear that's just your type. Let's go in this classroom and pork!

  Will Schuester : [pulling away]  No.

  Principal Figgins : I am praying for you, William. We've all heard about your gallivanting!

  Will Schuester : But nothing happened!

  Ken Tanaka : Maybe that's not what matters, Will. You broke the heart of somebody who doesn't let people get close to her.

  Will Schuester : I didn't mean to hurt anybody.

  Ken Tanaka : You probably didn't mean to hurt me, either, but lately I've been feeding my feelings to the tune of 6,000 calories a day.

  Sue Sylvester : [passing Will again]  Slut.

• Emma Pillsbury : I'm a little confused.

  Sue Sylvester : I understand. You're probably wondering "What exactly does Sue Sylvester mean when she says 'I'm your new therapist'?". Well, let me explain. As you may or may not know, I star in a little music video that's been circulating around the Web. A video that has a tendency to induce cruel, slow-motion laughter.

  Emma Pillsbury : No. No. Didn't... didn't know about that.

  Sue Sylvester : Well, this video has inspired Sue Sylvester to start giving back. I happen to have my Masters in counseling, and when I heard that our school district's one and only psychologist had committed suicide, well, I decided to volunteer my services. And they gave me your name. I'd really like to help.

  Emma Pillsbury : I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.

  Sue Sylvester : Ella, you're crippled by mental illness. Your compulsions have estranged you from your own feelings. You nearly married a gym teacher who's more gravy than man. And you're content to be repeatedly lied to by the man you purport to love.

  Emma Pillsbury : I'm sorry?

  Sue Sylvester : I bribed Will Schuester's landlord to slip baby monitors under his couch, and under his bed. Turns out he's been having make-out sessions with the coach from Vocal Adrenaline, and sleepovers with that world-class banana magnet April Rhodes.

• Sue Sylvester : You need to make a bold move. You suck.

  Emma Pillsbury : Excuse me?

  Sue Sylvester : You take weird little strides when you walk, as if you were raised in imperial Japan and someone bound your feet.

  Emma Pillsbury : You make a valid point.

  Sue Sylvester : Grow a pair. I'm insulting you. You refuse to stand up for yourself, you're so afraid of confrontation.

  Emma Pillsbury : You're right.

  Sue Sylvester : If you want to get better, you need to start communicating your feelings. You need to let Will Schuester know how he's made you feel, and in a public setting, so he can't escape and he won't manipulate you. Trust me, you need to let him have it.

• Sue Sylvester : [voiceover]  This is not happening. The cruel, slow-motion laughter is just your imagination. You're Sue Sylvester, legend. They're not laughing at you because your "Physical" video. Just calmly pour yourself a cup of joe and focus. Wait, what's that smell? Dear god, that's coffee. It's usually masked by the smell of fear. Sweet merciful Lord, this is happening! You're being laughed at in slow motion by a roomful of inferiors whom you used to terrify.

• Will Schuester : You know, Sue, there are a lot of people at this school who dislike you. My kids don't do stuff like this.

  Sue Sylvester : Is that so? Exhibit B.

  Will Schuester : What's a Glist?

  Sue Sylvester : It's a "Glee List", William. It's a weekly ranking of your glee club, based on a hotness quotient of sexual promiscuity. It was posted all over the school an hour ago. Apparently, you get a point for each act of perpetuated depravity.

  Will Schuester : What makes you think my kids did this?

  Principal Figgins : The Glist was made on a library computer using the pass code "gleeclub".

  Sue Sylvester : Your glee club is a petri dish of sexual depravity.

  Principal Figgins : Sue's right, Will. Why, only last year, a list was posted ranking McKinley's ten ugliest Gingers. And the perpertrator would have been expelled had it not turned out to be a member of the faculty!

  Sue Sylvester : I stand by that list.

• Sue Sylvester : You know, a week ago, had I found a list that so degraded the glee club, I would've been embarrassed I was beaten to the punch. But now I know the white-hot shame of public rebuke; that pain is indescribable.

  Principal Figgins : William, last year at West Dayton High, a photo circulated of school superintendent...

  Sue Sylvester : And what was he wearing?

  Principal Figgins : Women's lingerie.

  Sue Sylvester : And what was he riding?

  Principal Figgins : Pony!

  Sue Sylvester : And who was expelled?

  Principal Figgins : The entire school!

  Sue Sylvester : The entire school was expelled, Will!

  Will Schuester : What does that have to do with me?

  Principal Figgins : You must find out who made the Glist and suspend them before they post another one, or I'm holding the entire glee club responsible!

  Will Schuester : Are you serious?

  Principal Figgins : Deadly serious! I cannot have these shenanigans at this school!

  Sue Sylvester : He cannot have these shenanigans at this school!