Shining Time Station (TV Series)

The Magic Is Believing (1991)

George Carlin: Mr. Conductor

Quotes 

• [first lines] 

  Mr. Conductor : Hi! Look what I found. I once did more than 500 paddles in a row. Then the band broke and the ball came off. It turned up later, though, disguised as a meatball in my aunt Lily's spaghetti.

• Mr. Conductor : [teaching how to paddle]  It's all in the wrists... or is it the neck? Could be the arms... Sticking out your tongue helps.

• Mr. Conductor : You don't believe in magic?

  Becky : I just said I didn't - Wait - How did you do that?

  Kara : Do what?

  Becky : Just say I don't believe in magic in a different voice. Without moving your lips.

  Mr. Conductor : She didn't say it. *I* did. Are you positive you don't believe in magic?

  Becky : [looking around]  Who said that?

  Mr. Conductor : I did. And I can tell you one or two things about magic that are quite real.

  Becky : Cut it out, you two; you're scaring me.

  Dan Jones : We aren't doing anything.

  Mr. Conductor : [standing up as he sees him in the paddleball- box]  Nothing to be scared of, Becky. Are you sure you don't believe in magic?

  Becky : It's a little man!

  Dan Jones : It's Mr. Conductor.

  Becky : [starting to reach for him]  Wait a second - neat; how does a doll like that run, on batteries?

  Mr. Conductor : Stop it! I don't come with batteries!

• Becky : Are you a magician?

  Mr. Conductor : [seriously]  No. I am who I am. And who I am is who I'll be, see?

• Mr. Conductor : So you new-timers just remember: don't sell us old-timers short. We still have a lot of tricks up our sleeves.

  [plucks a floating card from his sleeve] 

• Mr. Conductor : If you believe in somebody, believe in them all the way.