Community (TV Series)

Comparative Religion (2009)

Gillian Jacobs: Britta Perry

Photos 

15 more photos

Quotes 

• Shirley : Uh, quick question. Are you all coming to my Christmas party right after the final, or are you stopping home to change into your Christmas outfits?

  Annie : [Breaking the silence]  I guess I could wear one of my Hanukkah sweaters.

  Shirley : Uh, Annie.

  [Uncomfortable] 

  Shirley : I didn't know you weren't, uh, Christian.

  Annie : Yep. One might even say I'm Jewish.

  Shirley : [Faking tolerance]  Oh, tha-that's good for you. Tha-that's wonderful. I respect all religions of the world.

  Abed : I'm Muslim.

  Troy : Jehovah's Witness.

  Britta : Atheist.

  Shirley : [With raised eyebrows]  The Lord is testing me.

• Shirley : I did my best to create a special Christmas for my *one* intact family... and this is the thanks I get.

  Annie : Shirley, you are a guilt machine.

  Pierce Hawthorne : And Annie knows a thing or two about guilt. Am I right, Jew?

  Annie : Say the whole word!

  Pierce Hawthorne : ...Jewie?

  Troy : You would never catch a Jehovah's Witness saying "Jewie."

  Pierce Hawthorne : Tell it to the birthday cake you never got. You know, there's an old Buddhist saying...

  Britta : You are not a Buddhist, you are in a cult.

  Pierce Hawthorne : Suck it, Nietzsche.

  Annie : Guys, everyone's faith is weird. Let's just not talk about it.

  [all speaking indistinctly] 

• Britta : Are we really gonna let religion divide us like this. I think there's one thing we can all agree on.

  Abed : I get 72 virgins in heaven.

  Britta : No. That we would all like to have Jeff at this party.

• Pierce Hawthorne : Where should I put my Buddha incense holder?

  Britta : I'm pretty sure that's a bong.

• Pierce Hawthorne : Men were wired to fight each other so women could choose the right mate.

  Britta : No, the real reason men fight is to release their pent-up gayness.

  Pierce Hawthorne : That guy wasn't gay. He had a mustache.

• Pierce Hawthorne : I'm born-again.

  Shirley : [Perks up]  Oh!

  Pierce Hawthorne : We had a re-birthing ritual in my friend's hot tub. I'm now a level five Laser Lotus in my Buddhist community.

  Britta : That does not sound like Buddhism. You sure you're not in a cult?

  Pierce Hawthorne : Just by asking me that question, you put me back down to a level four. You now owe me 2000 Energon cubes.

• Shirley : It stands for "What would baby Jesus do? " And it's to remind us that the real meaning of this season is Christmas.

  Britta : Oh, well, thank you, Shirley. I'm gonna put that in the pocket closest to my heart.

  [Drops it down her shirt] 

• Troy Barnes : [teaching Jeff how to fight]  No, it's a question. What's up?

  Jeff Winger : What's up?

  Troy Barnes : Not a real question, a rhetorical one. You have the answer, he does not. Then you give them the Forest Whitaker eye.

  Jeff Winger : Oh, that's pretty good.

  Troy Barnes : Okay, hold that stare. There you go. Hold it. Then, look straight through his eyes and deep into his soul.

  Britta : And then you move to Vermont.

  Troy Barnes : I'm sick and tired of you saying that fighting is gay.

  Abed : She's got a point. In boxing, you fight for the purse and a belt.

  Britta : I've gotta write a paper about that. Let's see what we're working with.

• Shirley : Jeffrey. Kick his ass.

  Mike : Cavalry's here. Shirts off, boys.

  Britta : Come on, I'm being punk'd, right?

• Britta : And you can start by rooting for Jeff while he rolls around on the ground, groping another man. That's what I'm gonna do.

• Mike : Hey, look at that, Forehead's taking a test.

  Jeff Winger : Why don't you get going, Chuck Norris?

  Mike : Did you just shoo me?

  Britta : Why don't you just kiss him already?

  Mike : Dude, I will shoo your nose down your throat.

  Jeff Winger : Señor Chang, can you do something about this?

  Señor Chang : I'll allow it.

  Mike : Qué pasa here, huh? It's usted, dude. Even I know that.

  [knocks test off the desk, laughing] 

  Jeff Winger : You picked the wrong day to correct my Spanish, No Sleeves. It's on.

  Abed : He's doing this for me. He's my bodyguard.

  Mike : You wanna dance?

  Britta : To some show tunes?

  Jeff Winger : No, I want to beat you and I'm gonna enjoy it, because you're like this school. You're obnoxious, cramping my style and you smell like french-fry oil.

  Mike : I don't get it.