- Steve Fleming: I'm gonna join Dan Miller's cabal and then we are gonna take you down, down to Funky Town! Funky Town Central, here we come! Choo-fucking-choo!
- Man: Do you want to swim the Channel for Scope?
- Malcolm Tucker: No!
- Man: Would you want to go on Dragon's Den for Children in Need?
- Malcolm Tucker: I'd rather fuck a real dragon.
- Man: Would you consider promoting a political-themed restaurant?
- Malcolm Tucker: How does that - how does that even work? Oh fuck no, I don't care.
- Man: Would you like to write a children's book, called "The Angry Spider"?