Archer (TV Series)

Diversity Hire (2010)

Jessica Walter: Malory Archer

Quotes 

• Sterling Archer : What? You're black... ish.

  Agent Lana Kane : Ish?

  Sterling Archer : Well, what's the word for it, Lana? You freaked out when I said 'quadroon'.

  Agent Lana Kane : Imagine that!

  Sterling Archer : You imagine it!

  Malory Archer : Both of you imagine shutting up!

• [first lines] 

  Malory Archer : And if that happens again I'll put a lock on it so no one can enjoy it.

• [last lines] 

  Malory Archer : Well, Conway's gone. And I'll have nothing to remember him by.

  Cheryl : [comes in carrying a blue stick]  Except his little mocha love child!

  Malory Archer : Oh, my God! You had sex with Conway!

  Cheryl : Yeah, and he totally impregnated me.

  Malory Archer : But - wait. He was only here for two days. How in hell is that pregnancy test showing positive?

  Cheryl : No, this is just a detergent pen. I just put a blue sticker on it.

• Conway Stern : I've tracked him to South Beach, where he's arranged to sell the plans to Cuban naval intelligence. If that happens, undetectable Cuban missile subs could be parked off Miami Beach.

  Malory Archer : Ugh! Just what Miami needs, more Cubans.