- Deputy Chief Brenda Leigh Johnson: So the baseball bat didn't kill him?
- Dr. Morales: No. Though it probably really annoyed him as he was dying of a broken neck.
- Deputy Chief Brenda Leigh Johnson: Yes, Lieutenant, it's always good news when suspects in a homicide can point to us for their alibi.
- Deputy Chief Brenda Leigh Johnson: Look, whenever a member of my division stumbles on a body, it is automatically a major crime.
- [Brenda gives an assignment]
- Deputy Chief Brenda Leigh Johnson: Consider this your chance to prove that the women weren't using you.
- Andy Flynn: And if they were?
- Deputy Chief Brenda Leigh Johnson: Use 'em back.
- Ashley Rogers: Do you know how to be quiet?
- Louie Provenza: I think so.
- Ashley Rogers: Well, that's too bad, because I only know how to be loud.
- [running gag on word choice]
- Deputy Chief Brenda Leigh Johnson: So how does a criminal with a drug history end up dead in the bathroom of a stewardess's condo?
- Julio Sanchez: Uh, I think they're called "flight attendants" now, Chief.
- Will Pope: Do you have any idea how difficult it is to explain this kind of behavior when you're applying to be Chief of Police?
- Deputy Chief Brenda Leigh Johnson: I might.