- [Castle being interrogated after being discovered at the crime scene with a gun in his hand]
- Richard Castle: So you, being the expert veteran of dozens of crime scenes, decided to pick up the murder weapon, to what? Ensure that we had your prints?
- Richard Castle: Maybe you missed the part where I said she was shot dead. When I heard the noises coming from the next room, I thought whoever killed her was coming back. So I picked up the gun to defend myself. It seemed like a very good idea at the time. That's when you, Esposito, and Annie Oakley come bursting through the door.
- [in the observation room with Ryan and Esposito]
- Captain Roy Montgomery: Annie Oakley?
- Kevin Ryan: [pause] I kind of almost shot... Castle.
- [seeing Montgomery's look]
- Kevin Ryan: What? He had a gun.
- [last lines]
- [wondering if his daughter is speaking to the boy she met over the summer]
- Richard Castle: Is that... ?
- Martha Rodgers: Yeah... Been on the phone for over an hour.
- Richard Castle: So who called whom first?
- Martha Rodgers: What's it matter? As long as they connected.
- Javier Esposito: [at her desk, Beckett absent-mindedly stares at Castle's chair] If you ask me, you should have locked him up just out of spite.
- Kate Beckett: No, that would be unethical. Making the people down in Holding deal with him?
- Javier Esposito: True.
- [seeing a cardboard cutout of Castle in a bookstore window]
- Kevin Ryan: He really is ruggedly handsome.
- Richard Castle: Do you know what these bodies are? A sign.
- Kate Beckett: A sign?
- Richard Castle: A sign. A sign from the universe telling us we need to solve this case together. You don't wanna let the universe down, do you?
- Kate Beckett: You're not gonna go away no matter what I do, are you?
- Richard Castle: I respect the universe.
- [at a burlesque club being investigated]
- Richard Castle: This place is like the circus with alcohol! How have I never been here before?
- Kate Beckett: You think this is crazy, you should see some of the clubs I've been to.
- [trying to determine the connection between the three victims]
- Richard Castle: Maybe they're top CIA agents targeted for termination.
- Kate Beckett: CIA is a popular theory with you.
- Richard Castle: Yes. Well, law of averages demands that I'll eventually be right.
- Kate Beckett: [sarcastic] I'd forgotten how helpful your insights can be.
- Richard Castle: Oh, yeah? I bet I figure out how they're connected before you do.
- Kate Beckett: All right. You're on. But if I win, you have to promise to go away and never interfere with any of my cases *again*.
- Richard Castle: Fine. And if I win, you have to take me back as your partner.
- Kate Beckett: Deal.
- Richard Castle: [glancing over at Ryan and Esposito] What if they figure it out first?
- [they look at Ryan and Esposito together, then back at each other]
- Richard Castle, Kate Beckett: Nah.
- [after finding a possible connection between the victims to crystal meth production]
- Richard Castle: It's so obvious. I can't believe I didn't think of it sooner.
- Kate Beckett: Do you really think it was meth?
- Richard Castle: It's the only thing that makes any sense. All of our victims were struggling financially. One night, after the club closes, they're all together talking about their money woes, until our high school chemistry teacher cracks a smile and says,
- [laughs]
- Richard Castle: "Well, we could always make meth." But the others don't laugh... They say, "yeah. we *could* make meth... just like that cable show." I'm telling you... it's drugs.
- Lanie Parish: I hear you made an interesting arrest today. You wanna talk about it?
- Kate Beckett: No.
- Lanie Parish: Okay. Keep holding that stuff in, you're going to get an ulcer.
- [at his desk, Ryan is trying to balance an egg on its tip; as Beckett walks by, it falls on the floor and breaks]
- Kate Beckett: Are you guys re-enacting the Humpty Dumpty crime scene?
- Kevin Ryan: It's the autumnal equinox today.
- Javier Esposito: Yeah, and according to Mr. Wizard there, it's the only time of year you can balance an egg on its tip.
- Kate Beckett: Don't you guys have work to do?
- Javier Esposito: Nah.
- Kate Beckett: No, not really.
- Kate Beckett: Hmm. Well, now you do.
- [tosses a folder onto Ryan's desk, points to the egg mess, then heads to her own desk]
- Kate Beckett: By the way, that whole thing with the egg is just urban legend.
- Kevin Ryan: Not true. I saw Castle do it last year.
- [after an awkward pause, Esposito gets up and slaps his head]
- Javier Esposito: [quietly] What's wrong with you?
- Javier Esposito: [about Castle] Still no word from him?
- Kate Beckett: No.
- Kevin Ryan: Maybe you should call him.
- Kate Beckett: He said that he would be back in the fall. And it's fall. So, clearly, he has better things to do.
- Kevin Ryan: [at the crime scene outside a bookstore] Hey, it's Castle!
- [seeing Castle approaching, they realize it's just the store owner carrying a cardboard cutout of Castle holding "Naked Heat"]
- Kevin Ryan: I guess he did finish that book.
- Lanie Parish: [sarcastic] Nice of him to send us a copy.
- [the store owner puts a cardboard poster of Castle up in the window reading "Meet the author this Friday at 7 PM"]
- Kevin Ryan: Looks like he's back in town.
- Javier Esposito: [also sarcastic] Nice of him to call.
- Kate Beckett: All right, guys, you can stop pining for your girlfriend. After all, we got a body full of holes.
- Kevin Ryan: Hey. Bad news. According to the banks, our victims' deposits were made in cash. There's no way to trace the payments. And since the deposits were less than $10,000, there was no report made to the IRS.
- Kate Beckett: Which means that our victims were most likely involved in something illegal.
- Richard Castle: Just so you know, I got that from "shot to death."
- Kevin Ryan: So?
- [to Beckett]
- Kevin Ryan: So... what illegal activity involves vending machines, an artist, and a high school teacher?
- Richard Castle: I know. Even the stuff I'm making up in my head doesn't make sense.
- Kate Beckett: [having determined that the victims were printing counterfeit money together] So... plates, paper... there's only one missing ingredient.
- [pause]
- Richard Castle, Kate Beckett: I know who the killer is!
- Kate Beckett: You've been informed of your rights, Mr. Castle?
- Richard Castle: Really? You're not even gonna ask me how my summer was?
- Kate Beckett: You are aware that you're under arrest for murder?
- Richard Castle: And I thought you were being rough with the cuffs just for fun... You look good.
- Kate Beckett: [half-smiles] You look good, too.
- Richard Castle: Yeah?
- Kate Beckett: For murder.
- Kate Beckett: Were you sleeping with her?
- Richard Castle: How is that relevant?
- Kate Beckett: Motive.
- Richard Castle: Ah... No, I wasn't sleeping with her.
- Kate Beckett: Are you sure? Beautiful woman...
- Richard Castle: I'm in a relationship.
- Kate Beckett: With whom?
- Richard Castle: Is that a new lipstick?
- Kate Beckett: Castle!
- Richard Castle: You know with whom.
- Kate Beckett: How should I know? I haven't seen you in months. You could have been in dozens of relationships with women since then.
- Richard Castle: You sound jealous.
- Kate Beckett: Jealous? Of you dating your second ex-wife and publisher? Tell me, does she make you do *everything* on a deadline?
- Richard Castle: Maybe you should get a new boyfriend, start over.
- Alexis Castle: You're not very good at this, are you?
- Richard Castle: Apparently not.
- [having been cleared of being a murder suspect]
- Richard Castle: So, what's our next move?
- Kate Beckett: There isn't one, at least not for you. You're going home.
- Richard Castle: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Two victims, one of them an acquaintance of mine, and you're sending me home?
- Kate Beckett: You're a witness, Castle. I can't have you involved.
- Richard Castle: I'm already involved.
- Kate Beckett: Castle, go home. Go back to your Hamptons, your ex-wife, your book parties. Okay? I've got work to do.
- Richard Castle: [confused about her attitude] What did I do?
- Martha Rodgers: Darling! Hello! Oh, you must see this video. It's absolutely charming.
- Alexis Castle: A penguin smacks another penguin into an ice hole. I'll show you.
- Richard Castle: Uh... maybe later.
- Martha Rodgers: Ooh! You look as if someone smacked you into an ice hole.
- Richard Castle: I stopped by the precinct.
- Alexis Castle: thought you weren't going back 'till after the book tour.
- Richard Castle: Yeah, well, fate intervened. Someone I know was murdered today.
- Martha Rodgers: Oh, Lord.
- Alexis Castle: Dad, that's awful. Who?
- Richard Castle: Maya, the woman who made that sculpture for me.
- Alexis Castle: Any leads?
- Richard Castle: No, not yet.
- Martha Rodgers: [after a pause] So, how is everyone? Beckett have a nice summer?
- Richard Castle: [flatly] Yeah, everyone's fine.
- Martha Rodgers: Now, why don't I believe you?
- [as Castle runs out of a building with gun in hand, Beckett points her gun towards Castle]
- Kate Beckett: Castle! Down on the ground, now!
- [Castle raises his gun and points it towards a shocked Beckett]
- Richard Castle: I know that look.
- Kate Beckett: What look?
- Richard Castle: That... "something doesn't add up" look.
- [Beckett and Castle are walking down a dark alley]
- Richard Castle: You sure this is the place?
- Kate Beckett: As sure as you are.
- Richard Castle: This doesn't look like a credit card kind of place. This looks more like a "get shot and robbed" kind of place.
- [first lines]
- [an out of breath Castle standing in a room of mirrors hears Ryan and Esposito off screen]
- Kevin Ryan: Where'd he go?
- Javier Esposito: I lost him.
- Kevin Ryan: Come on.
- Javier Esposito: Do you see him.
- Richard Castle: I was just trying to help.
- Kate Beckett: I don't need your help. How did you get here, anyway?
- Richard Castle: I was... I was following up a lead. Same as you.
- Kate Beckett: Oh, really? So you subpoenaed the victim's phone records and looked for commonalities?
- Richard Castle: No, not exactly.
- Kate Beckett: Then what?
- [Castle smirks, but doesn't reply; Beckett grabs his ear]
- Richard Castle: Ow! Okay, I star-69-ed. I star-69-ed.
- Kate Beckett: You star-69-ed?
- Richard Castle: Yes, on Maya's phone. I figured it would give me her last call. Rang up McCutchen here, I got his name from his voicemail and then I did a web search. Tell me you're not impressed.