Gossip Girl (TV Series)

Juliet Doesn't Live Here Anymore (2010)

Leighton Meester: Blair Waldorf

Quotes 

• Blair Waldorf : Serena! What are you doing on campus so early?

  Serena van der Woodsen : Watching you climb out of a brownstone vestibule with Chuck following like the Bass that ate the canary. And no denials. Your skirt's on backwards.

  Blair Waldorf : No, it isn't.

  [but checks] 

  Blair Waldorf : Fine. I may have slipped up... a little, but it's just sex, and a one-time thing at that. Or maybe a five-time thing.

  [Serena stands arms akimbo] 

  Blair Waldorf : Okay, if we're being honest, I've lost count how many times. Though, that depends on what you're actually counting as...

  Serena van der Woodsen : Blair, what are you doing? You've come so far, don't fall off the wagon now.

  Blair Waldorf : I haven't! It's just your ordinary, run-of-the-mill ex sex fueled by the most common of aphrodisiacs: mutual loathing and disdain.

  Serena van der Woodsen : May I remind you that both of those are feelings, and having *any* feelings for Chuck is where the problems always start.

  Blair Waldorf : There are so many feelings between me and Chuck as there are thoughts in Levi Johnston"s head.

  [shakes her head] 

  Blair Waldorf : We're nothing more than enemies with benefits. And quite a lot of judgment coming from you, Elizabeth Taylor. You're but one inappropriate relationship away from the Guinness Book.

  Serena van der Woodsen : Colin and I had a good talk this morning and he wants a real relationship too.

  Blair Waldorf : [sarcastic]  Yeah, I hear the 97th Street transverse is a lovely spot to drive past on a date. I saw you get in that cab!

  Serena van der Woodsen : We happen to be going away this weekend. So we can get to know each other like a normal couple while still adhering to our rules.

  Blair Waldorf : Please. Do you forget what happens to you on vacations? There's a reason why you never get a tan line. You have no willpower.

  Serena van der Woodsen : And you do?

  Blair Waldorf : Yes. I stopped having meaningful sex with Chuck. And I can just as easily stop having meaningless sex with him. In fact, I'm going to call him *right* now and make it clear that our little dalliance is finished forever. Maybe you should follow my example before you get your passport stamped again.

  [turns around, goes off, biting her lip] 

• Blair Waldorf : Dorota, you have to keep me away from Chuck for the next twenty-four hours, no matter what!

  Dorota Kishlovsky : But, Miss Blair...

  Blair Waldorf : Don't "Miss Blair" me! The only way to be done with this thing once and for all, is to have a Bass-ectomy! Now keep me occupied!

• Chuck Bass : [to Juliet]  Your obsession with Serena is growing tiresome.

  Blair Waldorf : Just because you have no money and delusions of grandeur, does not make it okay for you to be a single white-trash female.