Community (TV Series)
Basic Rocket Science (2010)
Donald Glover: Troy Barnes
Photos
Quotes
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Dean Pelton : Where are you hooligans? Bring my spaceship back!
[Troy consults the navigation chart]
Troy Barnes : Uh, we appear to be forty light years outside of the Buttermilk Nebula. Although, I think that...
[picks at the screen and peels it]
Troy Barnes : Yeah, it's a sticker.
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Jeff Winger : Great job up there, Captain.
Troy Barnes : Really? Think I could be a real astronaut someday?
Jeff Winger : If NASA ever needs someone to keep an arrow inside a moving rectangle, I know who I'd recommend.
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Abed Nadir : [over radio] Troy.
Troy Barnes : Abed?
Abed Nadir : You can get that window open by doing the simulation. Look at the panel on your right and tell me your recipe.
Troy Barnes : Original.
Abed Nadir : How many pieces?
Troy Barnes : Six.
Abed Nadir : Flavor heading?
Troy Barnes : Tasty.
Abed Nadir : We need to get up to delicious.
Troy Barnes : That makes sense.
[Troy changes flavor heading to delicious]
Sanders : Excellent work, Captain. Now keep your herbs and spices balanced while the crew helps you with teamwork.
Troy Barnes : Guys, we can get the window open if you man your terminals and we complete the simulation.
Jeff Winger : Yeah, I got a better idea.
[Jeff starts beating on the window with a fire extinguisher]
Pierce Hawthorne : We're all dying. We're all gonna die!
Sanders : My readings indicate the need for cooperation.
Troy Barnes : I hate to pull rank on you, but I need you to man your station now, Jeff.
Jeff Winger : I hate to pull reality on you, but you got your rank, Captain, by sitting in the chair with the largest knobs.
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Annie Edison : Guys, please! You're becoming animals!
Britta Perry : Oh, shut up! We wouldn't even be here if it wasn't for you.
Annie Edison : That's not true! We weren't supposed to be in here when it happened!
Jeff Winger : When what happened? When we got towed?
Shirley Bennett : How did you know we were gonna get towed?
Shirley Bennett : I set it up. I called City College about transferring and the dean told me that he would get me in if I helped sabotage Greendale's launch. I was supposed to make sure nobody was around so they could steal it. And then you guys were late, and then...
Britta Perry : Wait, wait, you're transferring? Why?
[Pierce muttering]
Britta Perry : You guys thought that butt hole flag was so funny. I mean, I respect you all to let you hate yourselves, but I respect myself too much to let you hate my school.
Shirley Bennett : Eh... I'm not buying it.
Troy Barnes : Yeah, let's kill her.
[Annie's gasps]
Jeff Winger : Wait, City College was behind this? We gotta get back in time for launch.
Britta Perry : Why?
Jeff Winger : We earned the right to pick on Greendale every day by going there. Our school may be a toilet, but it's our toilet. Nobody craps in it but us.
Britta Perry : Yeah.
Shirley Bennett : Now, that was inspiring.
Annie Edison : Seriously?
Jeff Winger : Captain.
Troy Barnes : Get to your stations. Thrusters.
Britta Perry : Full.
Troy Barnes : Thermal shield.
Annie Edison : On.
Troy Barnes : Navigation.
Shirley Bennett : Three.
Troy Barnes : Chicken.
Jeff Winger : Yeah.
Troy Barnes : Ready?
Annie Edison , Britta Perry , Jeff Winger , Shirley Bennett : Ready.
Troy Barnes : Suppertime.
[whirring]
Troy Barnes : [beeps] Hold it.
[beeping]
Troy Barnes : [midi celebratory music plays over simulator]
Sanders : Congratulations, crew. You've worked together. Now feast your eyes on the wonders of the cosmos.
Troy Barnes : [over radio] Greendale? Greendale?
Abed Nadir : Everybody, be quiet. Everybody, quiet down, quiet down. Say again?
Troy Barnes : [over radio] Standby for location.
[window cover opens]
Troy Barnes : [outside cow moos]
Abed Nadir : What do you see, gang?
Jeff Winger : [Jeff holds his blackberry against window glass for better service]
[cow moos]
Jeff Winger : We are in...
[over radio]
Jeff Winger : Coldwater.
Abed Nadir : [consults map] Here, they're next to the truck stop with three thumbs.
Dean Pelton : [under his breath] Those aren't thumbs.
Jeff Winger : [over radio] Greendale, do you copy? Greendale?
Abed Nadir : I'm sorry, Jeff. I'm afraid...
[over radio]
Abed Nadir : you're out of town.
[cows mooing]