Nostalgia Critic (TV Series)

Bio-Dome (2010)

Doug Walker: Nostalgia Critic

Quotes 

• Nostalgia Critic : They should just re-title this movie "Stupid White People Doing Stupider White Things."

• Nostalgia Critic : Sweet crispy Jesus, every time one of them speaks, I hear a child being murdered.

• Nostalgia Critic : Hello, I'm the Nostalgia Critic. I remember it... I fucking hate "Bio-Dome", I fucking hate "Bio-Dome", I fucking hate "Bio-Dome", I fucking HATE IT, I HATE IT, I HATE IT, I HATE IT, *I HATE IT!*

  [screams like a little girl until he gets splashed with a bucket of water, calming him down] 

  Nostalgia Critic : Thank you. Anyway, I fucking hate "Bio-Dome".

• Christopher Lloyd : [plainly]  I was frozen today.

  Nostalgia Critic : Oh, that's good to know. Thanks, Christopher Lloyd.

• 90's Kid : What you see is what you...

  [knock at door] 

  Nostalgia Critic : Who's that?

  90's Kid : Oh it's probably just my landlord with another eviction notice.

  [banging] 

  90's Kid : and a battering ram

  [rifle cocks] 

  90's Kid : and a sawed off shotgun. Gotta go!

• Nostalgia Critic : I smell shinanigans, or in their case, shit-nanigans.

• Nostalgia Critic : Wait a fucknugget!

• Nostalgia Critic : You know, I think this film is the Hot Pockets of movies: Nothing substantial, most likely will cause diarrhea.

• Nostalgia Critic : I'm beginning to think this movie is the predecessor to all those really bad YouTube videos you see. You know, the ones where two dickheads do dickhead-ish things while one dickhead laughs at the other dickhead while that dickhead gets hurt, but sadly isn't crippled for life? That's this movie.

• Nostalgia Critic : Okay, these two were dropped. Either that or they're some kind of special needs kids, but there's no way these are normal functioning people. Especially if they think that THIS SHIT IS FUNNY!

• Nostalgia Critic : So, what do they do now that they're finally released out of their environmental prison? Throw a party of course, as they invite everyone they know back to the Bio-Dome so they can have a rockin' good time. The girlfriends hear about it at some sort of earth day event where they...

  [Tenacious D makes a cameo in the movie] 

  Nostalgia Critic : Tenacious D? Oh my God, real comedy! Real comedy at last! Oh, save me, Tenacious D! Help me to laugh again!

  Festival-Goer : Party at Bio-Dome? Alright, let's go!

  Nostalgia Critic : NO! NO! GO BACK TO TENACIOUS D, YOU ASS-MONGRELS! DON'T YOU KNOW REAL COMEDY WHEN YOU SEE IT?

  [scene cuts to the party at Bio-Dome] 

  Nostalgia Critic : D'OOOOHHH! How dare you cut back to those cock-eaters! You passed over the only talented people in the movie, you morons! It's like looking at a lineup of the world's greatest martial artists and being like... Jackie Chan? I don't think so. Bruce Lee? Maybe next time. Steven Seagal! Get in there.

  [pause] 

  Nostalgia Critic : ASS!