- Jesse Camp: He's got some dirt on me, so I would love to get some dirt on him. That would even out the dirt field.
- Mr. Plinkett: Oh, here. You're probably going to need this biohazard kit. It's very likely that the tomato paste has aids in it.
- Jesse Camp: There's a problem.
- Martin: You can't get it up?
- Jesse Camp: My boss, Mr. Plinkett.
- Martin: He can't get it up? Why do you know that?
- Mr. Plinkett: Come in. Lock the door, please.
- Call Girl: Ummm. I'd rather leave it unlocked.
- Mr. Plinkett: And, I'd rather you didn't.
- Call Girl: *Sighs* Okay. Listen, Mister. I charge more for cripples.
- Mr. Plinkett: Why?
- Call Girl: Be-cause it's more work on MY part.
- Mr. Plinkett: Ah, I guess that makes sense.
- Mr. Plinkett: Looking for something asshole?
- Jesse Camp: No, Mr. Rowley left his checkbook.
- Mr. Plinkett: Well good for that grits eating motherfucker.
- Jesse Camp: Just because I bring home a girl who's unconscious and covered in blood doesn't mean that there's a problem.
- Mr. Plinkett: I vowed to stop at nothing to bring them back. Well, except my other two sons, I guess they're fucked.