Atop the Fourth Wall (TV Series)

Superman: Distant Fires (2011)

Lewis Lovhaug: Linkara, Harvey Finevoice, 90s Kid, Lt. Munroe

Quotes 

• Linkara : Superman talks about how everyone he knew is dead.

  Superman : Even Clark Kent is dead, but I don't have to bury him. Kal-El. Clark Kent. Superman. As far as I know, I'm it, the sole survivor of a holocaust, for the second time in my life.

  Linkara : [as Superman]  Man, do I have crappy luck or what?

• Linkara : [looking at the comic's cover]  The cover depicts Superman riding on the back of some giant cat off of a flaming cliff, with tons of superheroes flying behind him and a single bolt of lightning on the side. If I didn't know any better, I'd actually think we were looking at an album cover here. The only way this could be more metal is if he was riding a shark.

• Linkara : We open to a prologue, since we know those make your comic more classy, right?

  Narrator : Back in the dawn of the computer age, an IBM executive was quoted as saying that he envisioned a worldwide need for no more than a dozen computers - ever.

  Linkara : We shall refer to this person as "Nitwit" from now on.

  Narrator : Maybe if we'd listened to his prediction and taken a different route into our own future, perhaps things might have turned out differently... but perhaps not. There is, after all, simple human error.

  Linkara : And then half a dozen technological leaps that make our lives better may not have happened, and I'd be out of a job. By the by, the omniscient narrator is bringing up this quote as reference to a nuclear war that has occurred, making the quote. I've heard this before, and unless I've missed my mark, it's referring to the idea of having personal computers at home. If we had "listened to his prediction", it wouldn't have made a crap bit of difference, since computers used to coordinate and utilize nuclear weapons would still be in use. Right off the bat, a quote is brought up for no other reason than to sound profound, but instead, it just comes off as pretentious and stupid. Well done, comic!

  Narrator : There wasn't even any time for either side to lay blame on the other. Before anyone knew it, the missiles were in flight, without a human eye to watch the arc of green and red blips across a computer screen.

  Linkara : And this is what you get when you take a bathroom break while playing "Missile Command".

• Linkara : Nuclear war devastates the planet.

  [Cut to a clip of Superman's big speech in "Superman IV"] 

  Superman : And there will be peace. There will be peace when the people of the world want it so badly that their government will have no choice but to give it to them.

  Linkara : Huh, I guess we just didn't want it bad enough.

• Superman : [narrating]  I started this journal on the day after doomsday.

  Linkara : [as Superman, pretending to write on a piece of paper]  Day one: canceled dentist appointment.

• Linkara : Superman talks about how everyone he knew is dead.

  Superman : [narrating]  Even Clark Kent is dead, but I don't have to bury him. Kal-El. Clark Kent. Superman. As far as I know, I'm it. The sole survivor of a holocaust... for the second time in my life.

  Linkara : [as Superman]  Man, do I have crappy luck or what?