- Jay wants nothing more than to have a quiet birthday out fishing on the lake, but the family take that as him wanting a big celebration, and in their frantic scramble to put everything together, Claire and Mitchell wind up trapped in the yard of their childhood home; Phil runs into his old college nemesis while at the mall with Gloria and Lily; Cameron gets himself into some hot water at the bakery, and the kids frantically do some creative editing on grandpa's birthday video, all of which leaves Jay with a headache.—ABC Publicity
- Jay's (Ed O'Neill) birthday is coming up, and Claire (Julie Bowen) doesn't think Phil's (Ty Burrell) card ("Hip, Hurray! - Better save that last hip for when you need it.") is a good idea, despite the nice bottle of wine to go with it. She actually took an idea from him to re-create a photo of her and Mitchell (Jesse Tyler Ferguson) when they were kids, just like Phil did for his parents. (Spaghetti bowl over himself.) Things seem a bit weird, but Mitchell was on board with it...in his sailor's uniform. Perhaps they should start to consult Jay, whose best birthday was when he took a boat out by himself for a day to go fishing. Gloria (Sofía Vergara) can't believe it, although Jay did apologize for not liking the chorizo the Sausage of the Month club sent him the prior month. ("What's this offended? A chorizo is not in our flag.") Cameron (Eric Stonestreet) drops Lily off with Gloria because she was driving him insane all morning with her crying for not getting dressed. Of course, Gloria needing to go to the mall to get Jay's gift won't stop Cameron from laying the guilt trip on her. Manny (Rico Rodriguez) needed Jay's advice on going to a friend's house. The glove gave away to Cameron that Manny was going to a girl's house, as Manny was trying to be something he wasn't. ("Boys do that for girls...or really dreamy boys.") As Tara, the girl Manny wanted to hang out with, was on the softball team, Cam volunteered to toss the ball around to the athletically-challenged Manny.
After running into his still-a-jerk college rival, Glen Whipple, at the mall, Phil was feeling a bit emasculated. Then Gloria showed up with Lily and people started mistaking the three of them for a family, including some very approving looks from other guys. Phil was suddenly feeling a lot less emasculated, and she heads for the shoe store.
Claire (wearing bell bottoms and a tight rainbow t-shirt) and Mitchell (wearing his sailor's suit and not worrying about the weird looks he was getting) ring the bell at their childhood home to re-create the picture of them as kids. A locked fence wasn't going to stop Claire. The rather large dog might, and Claire and Mitchell got chased up the treehouse. With their car being towed, they settled in with Dad's birthday gift. Claire has a knack for opening a wine cork without a corkscrew.
MITCHELL: Where did you learn to do that?
CLAIRE: Where did you get a sailor's suit on such short notice?
MITCHELL: Fair enough. (checks the wine) Eww, it's Merlot.
Manny calls Cam for advice on what to say to Tara. And Cameron delivers. ("You're the prettiest, smartest, funniest girl in the 6th grade. I know you're only eleven, but I can't stop thinking about you. I've loved talking to you online, and I think we should become boyfriend and girlfriend.") Of course, he said that in the middle of a bakery. ("Oh, no! It's not what you think. I'm talking to a little boy.") Oh, did we mention Cameron was picking up Jay's birthday cake? And now Jay has to pick up his own birthday cake, having had to pick up their dog from the groomers because he had Gloria's phone, and he is still no closer to the lake.
Haley (Sarah Hyland) and Alex (Ariel Winter) were attempting to do a video letter to Grandpa for his birthday. However, getting everybody to talk about Jay was...well, problematic. Luke (Nolan Gould) volunteered to break out the video editing tools to make a video that made sense. He just needed two hours...then an hour...and a chocolate milk with some salt in it.
Phil all but begged Gloria to go to the shoe store with him, but she was trying on dresses. The good news was, Glen Whipple was looking in the window...when the trolley wouldn't pass by. Phil tried to sell he was with someone to Glen, but he wasn't buying it. Until Gloria came out in a tight, low-cut dress.
GLORIA: I think this will make my husband very happy. What do you think, Phil?
PHIL: (FTW) Oh, very happy, Gloria. Very happy.
Except, not so For The Win. Glen actually confessed to being jealous of Phil because he was with Claire back in college and thought Phil would marry her.
GLEN: I can picture her smiling right now.
PHIL: I can't.
Claire and Mitchell, well buzzed by Jay's birthday gift, find a doll to throw across the yard for the dog (yes, Claire threw it), and they get down to call Jay, who was none too happy he had to pick them up and have his fishing trip ruined. Of course, Claire and Mitchell are snickering in the back because Jay had to climb the fence and almost wrecked his new pants. ("I thought he said rectum.") And if you think Mitchell putting Jay's cake out in the open for the dog to destroy it sounds like a bad idea, then you know it's a sitcom. Later on, after Jay got well-medicated, the family apologized to him for collectively ruining his fishing trip, but he said he was acting like a jerk. He loved everybody for making such a fuss over him. So it's time to open the presents. The photo Claire and Mitchell never got, the ruined cake, the bottle of wine that needs a refill, and a phone in the shape of a mouth. ("Wait a minute, I mentioned a few times taking up the saxophone. Is this a sexy phone??") Only one gift left: the video. Which lasted about six seconds and was the words "Grandpa, we love you" spliced together by whatever Luke could find in the videos. Haley and Alex were especially upset because they weren't in it, but Manny still hadn't given his present: Jay's boat in the pool so he could still have his day of fishing.
JAY: The old Jay would have said he wanted to be on a lake with a fishing rod and sunshine, not bobbing around at night in a swimming pool. I miss the old Jay.
Of course, everybody wanted in on the boat. Claire almost went in the water until Phil grabbed her. ("I got Claire!") But everybody enjoyed themselves, and Mitch and Cam even considered adopting another baby.
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