Atop the Fourth Wall (TV Series)

NBComics #1 (2011)

Lewis Lovhaug: Linkara, 90s Kid

Quotes 

• Nick McClary : Who are your Saturday morning favorites, kids?

  Linkara : Not you, that's for sure.

• Atom Ant : Roaches like garbage, so here's a whole truck full!

  Linkara : Wow, Atom Ant is kind of a dick. First of all, he's throwing a garbage truck at this cockroach, no doubt intending to murder it. Secondly, garbagemen provide a necessary and useful service to people, and you're just treating their truck like it's, well, garbage, and tossing it around without regard for the safety of whoever's inside of it, or the property itself. You know, at least when regular superheroes cause collateral damage, it's against beings more menacing and powerful than a GIANT COCKROACH, whose biggest crime so far was hitting a guy with a newspaper.

• Linkara : The noise the magic glove makes is "Kablooie." Who'd have thought explosions were in fact magic?

• [as seen in the "Yo Yogi" comic, the mall has a chairlift - with no seat belts] 

  Linkara : Okay, a few questions come to mind. One, why aren't there any seat belts or restraints on that thing? Two, why would you ever have a chairlift in a mall? You'd have to be the laziest damn people on the planet if escalators and elevators aren't good enough for you. Three, no, I don't care if it turns out that there actually is a mall with a chairlift system. That is frickin' stupid! I live in Minnesota, home of the Mall of America, AKA the mega-mall. It's four stories tall, and it has a movie theater and a theme park inside of it with rides and stuff, and there's still isn't a damn chairlift anywhere!

• Linkara : [noticing the ProStars' appearances]  GOOD GOD! WHAT THE HELL IS THIS? I DON'T EVEN... Where to start? Bo Jackson looks like his head was replaced with a pear, Wayne Gretzky looks like Bruce Campbell from "Army of Darkness" when his face was stretched, and... is that Michael Jordan? It can't be. It looks nothing like Michael Jordan! What's with the massive teeth? Why is his face twisted and stretched? Were they under the impression that Michael Jordan was some bizarre alien thing?

• Linkara : What does someone named Captain Mayhem promote exactly? Mayhem? Disarray? Chaos?

• Nick McClary : I'm gonna be a super hero, find Dad a great story and give Frankie a surprise as soon as I find my... I found it!... MY MAGIC GLOVE!

  Linkara : Kid, don't bother with magic gloves. You'll just end up with a dead Planeteer.

• Nick McClary : Awesome! Sure beats staying home alone!

  Linkara : [listlessly]  Ha... ha... ha...

• [Linkara is looking at a short "Saved By the Bell" comic] 

  Zack Morris : Kelly! Jessie! Lisa! Are you girls tryin' out for the cheer leader's squad?

  Kelly Kapowski : Forget it, Zack! We women today have too much pride for that RAH-RAH stuff!

  Jessie Spano : That's right!

  Kelly Kapowski : You'll never catch us jumping around and yelling for a bunch of dumb jocks!

  Jessie Spano : No way!

  Linkara : And insert your own Elizabeth-Berkley-in-"Showgirls" joke here.