Two and a Half Men (TV Series)
Big Girls Don't Throw Food (2011)
Jon Cryer: Alan Harper
Quotes
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Alan Harper : So you're saying you want to drop out of High School?
Jake Harper : Why not? Did you know that Walden made his first million before he was nineteen?
Alan Harper : How many zeros in a million, Jake?
Jake Harper : M-I-L-L-I-O-N. One!
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Walden Schmidt : Check this out! My socks match my sneakers.
Alan Harper : But your sneakers don't match each other.
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Walden Schmidt : Hey, I'm getting ready for my date with Bridget. How do I look?
Alan Harper : Your face should be on gay money.
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Alan Harper : You need to keep in mind that it's not like the old days. I am a guest here.
Jake Harper : You mean like the old days when you were a guest here?
Alan Harper : I was not a guest.
Jake Harper : Right, 'cause guests eventually leave.
Alan Harper : Charlie was my brother. He loved having me here.
Jake Harper : Wow, 'denial' isn't just a river in South America.
Alan Harper : Africa.
Jake Harper : What about it?