- [during Professor Zork's music lesson, a fire breaks out, necessitating the fire sprinklers to flood the class]
- Ms. Devine: Oh, dear! What a mess! Whatever were you conducting, Professor, a rain dance?
- Ms. Devine: This is Home Economics, and more specifically: wonderful ways with food, a total experience! In my class, you will be exposed to new food ideas! Use them wisely! And never, never, never be mundane! Be creative, be daring!
- [Behind her back, Rarf makes faces at Griz, who attacks him]
- Tess: [sees three tunnels] You know what this means, don't you?
- Boink, Bully: No!
- Tess: Jeez, when you gotta explain simple plot devices... we split up, each of us takes a different tunnel!
- Boink, Bully: Oh, yeah!
- Bully: Why didn't we think of that?
- Boink: Well, Tess's mom and dad let her stay up late and watch old movies...
- Ms. Devine: Attention! Your attention, please! I have a simply FABULOUS lesson planned! We are going to have a cooking contest! Yes, a bake-off!
- Grizzle: All right, a bake-off! Something I can really sink my teeth into, literally! I'll eat the losing entries! Aw, is this a great class or what?
- Logan: Am preparing special dish old-country food! Is beloved Papa's favourite: Czechy a la shingle! But first, must perform Czechy old-time old-country good-luck custom! Am needing special ingredient, not found in earth Mother's kitchen...
- [gets a whip and chair]
- Tess: [knocks on a door] Hello, Mr Janitor? It's okay, I'm a student! I'm not even selling girl scout cookies!
- Ms. Devine: Five minutes, class! Five minutes before judging!
- Grizzle: Oh, no! Five minutes! I've failed, I don't have anything ready! I'm gonna fail Home Ec! This is not gonna look good on my resume! Oh, if I don't pass I wont graduate, if I don't graduate I wont get a good job, and if I don't get a good job... I'll have to live at home when I'm an adult!
- [Rarf hurls dog food at Griz]
- Grizzle: Hey, watch it!... I think I just passed this class.
- [grabs a box of dog food...]
- [Rarf runs from the amorous mouse into Ms Devine's arms]
- Ms. Devine: Oh, Rarfy, whatever is the matter with you? Is this one of those dreary little instinctive things you lower animals have from time to time?
- Grizzle: Cereal and milk: it's simple, it's edible, it's worth a passing grade. Yeah, you'd have to be a real jerk to mess it up!
- [Rarf sneakily mixes in cement]
- Grizzle: [fixes a hot dog] What could possibly go wrong with a hot dog? Heck, I didn't even cook it!
- [Rarf steals the sausage]
- Grizzle: Oh where, oh where has my little dog gone?
- [Rarf cackles]
- Grizzle: As if I didn't know! Hand it over, Rarf and I MAY let you live!... On second thought, NAH!
- [Griz charges, Rarf drops him into a bowl of dripping]
- [a fire sprinkler goes off, Boink takes out some potted plants]
- Boink: This is a lot easier than getting my plants a drink at the water fountain...
- Grizzle: Let's see... I should create something I know and love. But they've already taken out the garbage, so I'll just have to improvise.
- Grizzle: [makes a sundae] Okay, stick with what you know and love and you will NEVER go wrong! And believe me, I know and love this stuff!
- Ms. Devine: [to Boink, Tess and Bully] Would you and you and, oh yes, you, be dears and find the janitor? Tell him to bring a mop!
- Boink, Bully, Tess: Janitor?
- Ms. Devine: Yes! You, know, those quaint lonely men with the names on their pockets? Tell him to clean up this mess, immediatement!
- Grizzle: What mess?
- Slogo Bonito: Must be creating mood for food, food I lovesky, food of my people, food of CIRCUS!
- [puts up a circus tent]
- Slogo Bonito: Men and gentleladies! Boys and girlskies! Directing attention to center ring, please! Where me, Slogo Bonito, is attempting to make unbelievababble circus food! Am asking for total silence please.
- Slogo Bonito: Cotton candy, popcorn, candy apples, hot dogs... the best circus food in world!
- [mixes it all together]
- Slogo Bonito: The prize is for suring to be mine!
- Poem Reader: I dreamed of a place called Yesterday's Zoo / that was full of friends I never knew. / Ten dinosaurs from distant shores hid underneath my bed / As nine pigeons searched for passages and nests inside my head. / Eight late, but great gray wallabies wondered what to do / As seven silent quaggas sat and stared outside the Zoo. / Six Falkland Island foxes fought and wrestled in the sand / As five quackers from Guadeloupe flew high above the land. / Four great hawks with four small clocks watched as time went by / Three wrens from Stephens Island sang a song that just asked "Why?" / Two dodo birds forgot the words, so they just hummed along / To that antiquated and outdated, twice-forgotten song. / One final thing, and then I'll bring this dream to its conclusion / and hope that I can simplify, without too much confusion: / All these friends I never knew / are now part of Yesterday's Zoo. / And all the friends I've yet to meet: the tiger, whale and the lorikeet / the dolphin, owl and the elephant and a thousand more, less eloquent... / See, dreams can sometimes happen, and dreams just might come true! / My dream is that my friends today stay out of Yesterday's Zoo.
- Ms. Devine: And the winner, although you all performed magnificently, is... Grizzle, who created these wonderful, delicious meat cookies! I simply must have the recipe for my next get-together! And now, dear present boy, your prize: the rare opportunity to care for and nurture my precious Rarfy-poo for an entire three-day weekend!
- [hands Rarf to Griz]
- Grizzle: [grinning] I'm so honoured, Miss Devine! We're gonna be the bestest buddies there ever was! I've even got a special little playmate just for Rarfy-poo...
- [Griz walks home with Rarf and the Siberian mouse]
- Grizzle: Say, Rarf, did I tell you my dad bought some new power tools?
- Rarf: NOOO!
- Grizzle: Just what I thought you'd say...