Criminal Minds (TV Series)

Painless (2011)

Matthew Gray Gubler: Dr. Spencer Reid

Quotes 

• Dr. Spencer Reid : [the music on Morgan's iPod suddenly stops, and is replaced by Reid's voice]  We interrupt your regularly scheduled musical selection with an important announcement: never wage a practical joke war against an MIT graduate, because we have a history of going nuclear. Now sit back, relax, and enjoy the dulcet sounds of me screaming in your ear. AAAAAAAAHHHHH!

  Derek Morgan : [Morgan takes off his headphones]  Okay, kid, that was cute. But that's all you got?

  [Reid snores, feigning sleep] 

  Derek Morgan : [his phone rings]  Hey, baby gi...

  Dr. Spencer Reid : [Reid's recording cuts in]  AHHHHHHH!

  [still feigning sleep, Reid smirks; to diffuse the situation, Rossi waves a white flag of surrender] 

  Derek Morgan : Uh-uh. All right, Reid, it's on. Just know that paybacks are a bitch.

• Dr. Spencer Reid : Boiling rage- SON OF A BITCH! Hi, this is Dr. Spencer Reid, I actually can come to the phone right now with a very special message that your mother is a to...

  Aaron Hotchner : Reid.

• Dr. Spencer Reid : [muttering]  I will crush you.

  Derek Morgan : What?

  Dr. Spencer Reid : [innocently]  What?

• Dr. Spencer Reid : [When JJ claims she can't remember ever being bullied in high school]  Were you one of the mean girls?

  Jennifer Jareau : Wh - ? No!

  Dr. Spencer Reid : Valedictorian, soccer scholarship, corn fed but still a size zero - I think that you might've been a mean girl!

  Jennifer Jareau : *I* was actually one of the *nice* girls. Even to guys like *you*!

  Dr. Spencer Reid : Guys like me? I'll have you know that my social standing increased once I started winning at basketball.

  Jennifer Jareau : [Disbelievingly]  Oh yeah, you played basketball?

  Dr. Spencer Reid : No, I didn't play. I *coached* basketball. I broke down the opposing team's shooting strategy.

  Jennifer Jareau : Is that why Morgan kicked you out of the pool last week?

  Dr. Spencer Reid : Yeah. Took him three rounds to realize I was hustling him.

• Dr. Spencer Reid : [voiceover]  "You may leave school, but it never leaves you." ~~ Andy Partridge

• Emily Prentiss : What else do we have to go on?

  Jennifer Jareau : Spence said the UnSub would have broken his hand beating Chelsea to death. Did you notice anyone with a cast on their hand, someone who seemed hurt?

  Emily Prentiss : No.

  Dr. Spencer Reid : I might know why. This UnSub doesn't feel pain. There's a medical condition called pain asymbolia, where patients register harmful stimuli without being bothered by it. They've been documented holding their hand over an open flame because their brain doesn't send pain signals to the central nervous system.

  David Rossi : Sounds pretty rare. You sure the UnSub has it?

  Dr. Spencer Reid : The crime scenes prove it. This UnSub displayed an unusual level of savagery towards his victims. And consider this, he smashed through a glass display case, but there were not cuts on Jerry. That means he most likely punched through it as a show of force. Now, the only way the human body could withstand that level of pain is if he couldn't feel it at all.

  David Rossi : It must take a major toll on someone's emotional development.

  Derek Morgan : A significant contributor to our sense of empathy is the way we personally experience pain.

  Aaron Hotchner : And the UnSub didn't develop his sense of empathy because it was cut off. Does every person with asymbolia have this?

  Dr. Spencer Reid : Actually, most feel empathy just fine, which makes me think the rest of our profile is still accurate. Loner, invisible, outcast, boiling rage...

• Aaron Hotchner : What causes asymbolia?

  Dr. Spencer Reid : Severe trauma produces lesions in the insular cortex, usually after a stroke, but this UNSUB is so young it's most likely caused by an external factor.

  David Rossi : Like a bomb going off next to him?

  Dr. Spencer Reid : [Looking toward Derek Morgan]  Yeah, like a bomb going off next to him.