- Opening night of Nadja's vampire nightclub is threatened when the big musical guest cancels.
- While Nadja tries to get the legendary vampire rapper Rickie Suck to perform at opening night at her club, Nandor tries to use a wish to make himself perfect for his perfect wife. Meanwhile, Laszlo tries to teach Child Colin how to be a man, and learns a valuable lesson of his own about fatherhood.—Gislef
- Nadja goes to the council building, now her nightclub, and is impressed by the line on opening night. She says that Richie Suck will be performing at the opening, the greatest vampire rap artist of all time. Richie hasn't performed or done any new music for ten years, saying he's been working on his ultimate masterpiece. She makes sure that everyone knows that she's the owner of the club, Nadja's, and goes in.
Telling everyone that they'll have to wait an hour for Richie, Nadja goes in and the Guide tells her that the wraiths have topped off the blood sprinklers. Nandor is sitting at a table, and tells Nadja and the Guide that Marwa is at home He tells Nadja that he had the djinn make Marwa is perfect, but now he's worried that he won't be perfect enough for Marwa. Nadja tells him to use his wishes to make him more perfect, and Nandor seizes on the idea and goes. The Guide gets a message that Richie has canceled.
Nadja and the Guide go to where Richie lives, in a smokestack, and Nadja works out how they'll play Good Cop/Bad Cop. Richie's familiar Doctor Tom Schmidt refuses to let them in, saying his master is resting. Rich hears them and invites them in, and says that he's chilling. Tom explains that Richie has been traumatized by the music business and he's protecting him.
At the residence, Baby Colin is growing and is now a 6-year old, doing a Youtube channel. Laszlo wants to know what Guillermo has Colin doing, and complains that Colin is still doing boring shit. Guillermo says that Colin is doing interesting stuff as a child, and Laszlo is unhappy that Colin is into music theater, the lowest of all entertainment. Colin comes in and takes them to see his studio.
Laszlo takes Colin to a museum to teach him "manly" arts, and helps him break in and tells him that it's time to grow up. They find the laser alarm triggers, but Colin would rather talk about Legos and knolling. He sets off the alarms, and Laszlo flies Colin out.
At the residence, Nandor tells Guillermo that he's going to do some work on him. Being a good listener isn't part of and he tells the Djinn to give him the world's biggest penis. Guillermo draws Nandor out into the hallway and tells him to be careful, because djinns can twist wishes and toss in irony. Nandor decided to ask the Djinn that isn't so bad that it doesn't crush him, and it replaces the one he has.
Nadja tells Richie to do his biggest hits, and they'll do the rest. She offers Richie a bag of blood, but Tom tells him he can only have a little bit and Nadja figures that Tom is manipulating Richie, and it happens all the time in the music business. Tom finally gives the blood back and asks for twice as much money, for Richie and Tom the DJ. Nadja agrees, and Tom wants them to hire his jazz band as an opening act. Nadja figures that they have to kill Tom, which is also standard music business protocol.
To keep their excursion going, Laszlo throws Colin in a dumpster and tells him to kill six rats or he can't come out. Colin, covered in rats, is going through playbills that someone threw away. Laszlo is less than thrilled.
Nandor and Guillermo write down Nandor's wish and present it to the Djinn. The Djinn admits to the crew that he's not used to people being so detail-oriented. He admits that what they're doing is correct but annoying.
At the club, the jazz band plays while Richie sits at the bar. Nadja has the Guide distract Tom, while she berates Richie about letting a human transform him from a wild beast into a pussy-bitch. She tells Richie to take back his life, and show her his fangs.
Nandor has the Djinn read back his wish. Marwa comes and interrupts Nandor's "business stuff" and asks if he wants to the club.
Laszlo takes Colin out of the dumpster and walks him home, and talks about how he hated his father as a child, and Guillermo is right and Colin is going to be incredibly boring, but Colin is a better man that Laszlo. Colin, touched, takes Laszlo's hand, and Laszlo says that they should go to the club
Once the Djinn is done transcribing Nandor's penis wish, Guillermo interrupts and says that the Djinn can't give every man but Nandor a micro-wang. The Djinn irritably congratulates Guillermo on closing that loophole, which he would have done just to teach a lesson on greet and desire. He says that the two of them have bested him, and Guillermo has a sharp mind when it comes to penises. Nandor reluctantly thanks Guillermo for his help when Guillermo prods him to do so, and he'll think of Guillermo when he uses his penis.
The Djinn grants the wish, and Nandor checks it out and confirms that it's as he wanted. Guillermo doesn't want to get a peek, and heads to the club.
At the club, everyone boos as Richie hesitates to come out. Nandor arrives with Marwa, and he whispers to Guillermo that the Djinn made Nandor thinks Guillermo every time he uses his new penis. Meanwhile Nadja goes up and asks everyone if they're having a good time, and then tells Richie to be himself and presents him. Richie first brings out Tom and says that they've collaborated on a bunch of new songs, along with the jazz band. However, Richie says that he's not going to do them. When Tom objects, Richie throws him to the audience, who eat him. Richie then does observational comedy, which Nadja and the audience are less than thrilled about. Soon they're yelling for the jazz, and a fight breaks out. However, Colin gets up are on stage and belts out show tunes. The jazz band plays along and the audience get into it, and Laszlo encourages Colin,
Vampires love child novelty acts, and Nadja is thrilled that Colin is going to keep her club in business. Laszlo is thrilled that Colin has "the groove".
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