- Fergus Williams: Peter, I have a bit of news I should make you aware of...
- Peter Mannion: Yes, I do know, Fergus, a man with an amusing name has died.
- Fergus Williams: Uh, no, actually, it's that this morning, well, I set up a community bank.
- Emma Messinger: What?
- Peter Mannion: You did what? You s- you set up a bank?
- Phil Smith: I had a moment of weakness and they exploited it, like Hugh Grant!
- Fergus Williams: Yeah, well, didn't really have much choice because it was all going to piss in a kettle here, so we had to get the economist out of the way.
- Peter Mannion: What are you talking about? What economist?
- Fergus Williams: We were having a preliminary meeting when Phil was starting to cry, Glenn was having a meltdown, it was getting embarrassing!
- Peter Mannion: You bought a bank out of social embarrassment? I sometimes buy "The Big Issue" out of social embarrassment, I don't buy a FUCKING BANK!
- Fergus Williams: Peter, this is so fucking us!
- Stewart Pearson: Hold on, let's just wind back, let's just get this straight so that I can deal with you two properly, how much is this bank?
- Fergus Williams: Well, uh, two billion.
- Stewart Pearson: Sweet Tracy Emin!
- Emma Messinger: Two billion?
- Adam Kenyon: Alright, don't need to shit yourself about it, because we're not paying for it. It's funded by taxes.
- Emma Messinger: Oh, that's alright then!
- Peter Mannion: Oh! Great, the triple! I'm a nurse killer, a banker, and now I'm raising FUCKING TAXES?
- [Discussing the potential new Leader of the Opposition]
- Stewart Pearson: Let's architecturialise.
- Peter Mannion: Oh, don't bother. If it's Ben Swain, we all shout Sweaty Swain as he dehydrates himself through PMQs. Hollhurst looks like a shepherd dressed up to meet the Queen and if it's Dan Miller, we're fucked.
- Phil Smith: We don't even know why he killed himself yet. I mean suicide - it's pathetic. At least take some of your enemies with you. That's a noble death.