Star Trek: Lower Decks (TV Series)
I Have No Bones Yet I Must Flee (2023)
Roan K. Lai: Moopsy
Quotes
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[the away team has come to a menagerie to rescue two humans]
Jack Ransom : I know you're taking a hit losing these guys. We appreciate your positive attitude.
Narj : Not to worry. My real moneymakers are the Pyrithian Swamp Gobblers.
[Narj indicates the Pyrithian Swamp Gobblers' cage holding two terrifying-looking beasts with large teeth and screeching roars]
Moopsy : [camera pans down to reveal a moopsy, a cute little creature outside the Pyrithian Swamp Gobblers' cage. A Pyrithian Swamp Gobbler sees the moopsy, stops roaring, and backs away from the moopsy, whining with fear] Moopsy!
Narj : [nonchalantly] Hmm?
Narj : [suddenly terrified] Oh, fuck! The moopsy is free!
Beckett Mariner : [mockingly] Oh, no, your cuddliest prisoner is loose. Whatever shall we do?
Narj : You don't understand! Everything here is incredibly dangerous!
Moopsy : [Moopsy climbs through an access panel into the Pyrithian Swamp Gobblers' cage] Moopsy!
Jack Ransom : Can't be worse than the swamp gobblers.
Narj : Of course it's worse! They only gobble you. The moopsy drinks your bones!
Beckett Mariner : How does something drink bones?
Beckett Mariner : [Moopsy jumps on the back of a swamp gobbler, bites its neck, then sucks on it, causing the gobbler to collapse into a boneless mass of flesh] Holy fuck!
Narj : Run! Run for your lives!
[Moopsy attacks other Pyrithian Swamp Gobbler, drinks all of its bones]
Jack Ransom , Beckett Mariner , Ensign Gary : [running from cage room, screaming]
Moopsy : [casually waddling out of the Pyrithian Swamp Gobblers' cage into the cage room] Moopsy!
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Beckett Mariner : Hey, Narj, what got you in the prison business, huh? Just a cruel weirdo who loves locking people up?
Narj : A prison is a place for criminals. I've given these sweet creatures a safe home.
Beckett Mariner : What about this little guy? He doesn't deserve to be in your fucked-up hobby.
Narj : Hobby? The moopsy is Narj's favorite.
Moopsy : Moopsy!
Beckett Mariner : Do you imprison everything you like?
Narj : Of course.
Jack Ransom : [chuckles] Mariner, it's not our place to judge the menagerie. We're just here to pick up the humans.
Beckett Mariner : No, *you're* here to collect humans; *I'm* here to *be* human, which means calling bullshit when I see it.
Narj : Narj does not understand. Narj abides by Federation law.
Jack Ransom : [chuckles] Don't worry about it. She's a firebrand, but I trust her with my life.
Beckett Mariner : No, you're not getting in my head!
[looks into the moopsy enclosure]
Moopsy : [purrs, wiggles its butt as if preparing for a pounce] Moopsy!